Should I forgive him?

[Jolo77]

I have just found out that my boyfriend of 3 years has been meeting up with a girl from his work, they have kissed several times and they had arranged to meet up to hook up. When I confronted him about the messages, he said he would of never gone through with it, should I forgive him?

Seriously? He's cheating on you and you're thinking of staying in?

Seriously????! NO

Hi Jolo, I am so sorry you are going through this. What a betrayal of your trust and now you are being asked to trust that he wouldn't have gone on to sleep with this girl. He has already cheated on you by meeting up with her behind your back. Is it likely on that basis that he wouldn't have gone onto a more physical relationship with her. What is your gut telling you? Do you believe him? Only you can answer that question. It might be a good idea to imagine what it would be like to stay with him and how you would cope with the anger and doubt you will have. This is a serious blow to your self-esteem and what if he cheated on you again? Best of luck.

No

Hell no

Definitely not.
I could probably forgive a one off kiss or drunken fumble (not sex) at a Christmas party, but it would take a lot. Repeated occasions and planning ahead to deceive you is absolutely not acceptable. Of course he said he "wouldnt go through with it" after you caught him 🙄

No, and they've already shagged.

He's already gone through with it OP . He's cheated ,he is having an affair, Still would be if he hadn't have been found out. He fancies someone else OP likes them, is dating them, wants to sleep with them, doesn't care about your feelings.

No you shouldn't forgive it, I doubt you'll be able to either way.

Sorry that this has happened, you deserve better and he is twat, why would you want him.

Why don't you buy a magic 8 ball?

Nope

Please don't.

This is not some guy you've been dating for a couple months, this is someone who you have shared your life with for three years; and yet he still respects you so little that he's cheated on you and now seems to be trying to excuse himself by saying he wouldn't actually go through with it? He has already gone through with it.

Also, if you hadn't found out, would he have told you? How do you know they haven't had sex? Does it really matter that they haven't had sex, given that he's still kissed her several times and has been lying to you and deceiving you?

Has he grovelled and taken full blame for his selfish actions? From what you've posted he doesn't sound particularly sorry but more like he's trying to play down the betrayal by claiming he wouldn't have had sex with her.

Get rid of him, you deserve better and he's made his bed.

No.

And anyway, I think forgiveness is something that happens (i.e. it is the result of an inner process), not what you try to or think you should do.

No

No, move on and meet somebody you can trust and who respects you. It’s only been 3 years which is long enough that there is no excuse for his behaviour but also not long enough that you should consider staying with him. Go and find the relationship you deserve.

No! Do not put up with this piece of shit, you are worth so much more than being treated like this. (Also he’s probably lying about having only kissed her)