Body confidence issues and new relationship

[Perpetuallysingle]

So, I've met a guy OLD had three dates and basically we are gagging for a shag now . Thing is I'm not very 'experienced' at all and never felt at all confident about my body and it's always held me back in relationships I suppose.

I have lost weight recently (2 stones) which helps. I kind of like my shape and size now but I have PCOS and errr body hair issues. Not horrendous but I don't shave 'down there' for one thing as the rash and regrowth issues are not worth it. Where I do shave around tops of legs etc I get awful skin with the regrowth and I feel really conscious about it.

So question is, do you talk about this stuff with new partner before you dtd? Or is he unlikely to give a flying fuck and it will just be a passion killer talking about my insecurities?! Do guys even notice/care about this stuff?

I think the question is do you want to be with someone who would judge you for things like that? Why should you shave if you don’t like it? I’m sure he won’t care though, my DH doesn’t!

I have pcos too and the hair growth thing was an issue for me too. Ingrown hairs, rashes and all that lovely stuffI bought a clippers set and trimmed with that so everything is short and neat but no horrible rash to go with it! Worked a treat! I bet the man you are seeing won't care but if you'll feel more confident, I recommend the clippers thing. Enjoy that shag!

I use Immac for my own happiness!!
Dh never cares what it's like down there!!
When I met dh he was a bit hairy - told him it had to go!! Don't think a chat about pubes is necessary op... Some nice knickers trumps you feeling itchy imo!!

I think younger men tend to care more about this than older men. Whether that gives you an answer or not i don’t know!

I have pcos too and it really held me back when I was younger. I just couldn't face getting naked with men. In my experience, depending on the age of the bloke, he won't be bothered by body hair. And if he is then maybe you don't want to be with him anyway?

Thank you ....I suppose the whole hair thing just makes me feel unfeminine and undesirable. Not particularly the pubes thing but over my thighs etc. I do shave my legs fully but then just get red blotchy skin which looks awful .

Ah well, he's awesome and I am pretty sure he won't care, but part of me worries he'll taking one look at me with no clothes on and think eugh.... (Even though he'd be to nice to say anything) ...

(I think partly I've just built this up in to far bigger an issue than it needs to be. Alot of women have confidence issues, whether it is hair, weight, stretch marks etc right? ...I should probably just get on with it ....)

I'm 40 and he's 46.....

I’m very dark and I find trimming down close helps more than shaving. Makes me feel better. Or Jolen bleaching

At 46 I doubt he will be bothered at all. Men of that age gained a lot of experience with women with hair in their youth and have no problems with it. I despair at the younger ones who expect it completely shaved.

I wander this too I have spider veins on my thighs, wobbly tummy, boobs not what they used to be and a c section tummy and a size 14-16

Firstly, well done for losing 2 stone!

I recently had hypnotherapy to try and be more in control of my eating habits. I'm not currently big, but I give into cravings a lot, and wanted to nip it in the bud before I put on more weight. Think I may have lost a pound or two.

What I have found is I think the hypnotherapy has made me feel less hung up about my body. I often had a very poor body image and eating disorder symptoms.

I'd put on a stone and didn't want to show my body to anyone. I stopped having sex for several months because of it. The hypnotherapy has helped me feel less unattractive and I was able to be intimate with my lover for the first time in months.

I was always a skeptic, but I would recommend hypnotherapy to target your body image and help you feel better about it, and to lose more weight if you feel the need.

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As to what the bloke might think- fuck blokes. If he's arsey about it then he's not worthy of anyone's time. I wouldn't mention it to him, as you said, it might be a non-issue for him- it should be.

I used to shave my legs sometimes, but it just gave me eczema or something so it looked shit. I'm never going to shave my legs again. Have ADHD so shaving/Immacing 'down there' always felt a massive chore. I decided just to trim in future, when I remember/can be arsed. Partners can live with it or bugger off.

So sorry you have to live with these symptoms- I have a hairy chin/moustache for some reason and have to shave, so I understand.

Anyone who shames you about it is a twat and not worthy of you. Hugs xxxxx

Thank you all. @workffs....hugs. I understand how you feel. I hope you find someone you can feel totally relaxed with.

@interested...awesome post and attitude! Thank you!

PCOS - my body is a shrine to Chewbacca!

I usually get my legs waxed so as to avoid shaving rashes (but give it a few days after the wax as it still leaves some redness), then I get a hot wax on my Chewwypuff - it always goes down a treat! 😉 The hot wax helps alleviate the pain of getting waxed.

Good luck!

I just feel the need to report back to you random internet pixies that in actual fact he clearly didn't give a flying fuck about the state of my undercarriage. Back of the net!

Well done op!!

😂 Good for you OP!

Aww you’ve made this hairy thighed, hairy nippled old hag smile. Good for you and long may it continue!

Yay! She shoots, she scores- every time! :) xxx

Makes me sad reading all you ladies comments about how you feel you look etc. Im sure most of it is in your heads and your all a bunch of beautys regardless of the hair, strech marks and extra weight! To OP really happy for you! You go girl!

@MotherofDogs3 you are so right! I'm far more confident than I used to be but still have my odd hang up. I totally forgot them though with this guy. I think he could be a keeper!