I just need somewhere to vent really.
Dh and I have been married for 20 years. 2 DCs aged 12 and 15.
Generally get on well but I feel on the brink of calling it quits.
He's a lovely man in many respects but he gets drunk regularly and behaves liked a total idiot.
He goes out once or twice a week a group of friends. I have no issue with that part. But this particular group drink alot. DH will come home drunk, sometimes he's ok and just tipsy but most of the time he an arse
I've just had enough of having to worry about what he will say and do when he comes home. The pattern is always the same . He is incredibly argumentative and difficult when hes drunk. He says the most spiteful things. In the morning he gets up early to make everyone breakfast and if you confront him he blames everyone else and twists it all.
He has always binge drunk but the behaviour is now impacting us all as he returns home earlier then he used to,so we are all still up. Last night for example he marched into 15 year old dds room and yelled at her for being on her laptop. She always goes on her laptop late at the weekend and I trust her. We also have all the filters on and lock down the wifi after certain times. He was just spoiling for a fight and I hate feeling as though I need to protect my children from their own father. I got him out of her room and the he started on me , calling me a cunt and how I'm like my father (estranged father who is a selfish bully and alcoholic ).
I have just had enough of it. I've told him that I see bo future and want us to separate. I have only recently started a new job so will need to wait a few months to get everything in order.
He immediately went online and signed up to some alcohol management course. I just dont believe him. I've heard it all before .
He even told me it was his friends fault as he doesnt drink that much with me when we go out! Theres just no acknowledgement that hes the one chucking the pints back and treating his family like crap.
.I know what I need to do. All I need right now is some MN support to get through christmas.
Theres a load of other backstory to this as well. We are no longer intimate which is never a good sign. Have some financial worries. And two years ago he badly hurt me when he was drunk. It wasnt deliberate but it happened because he was drunk. I nearly left him but decided to stay and for a while he stopped drinking. But in the last 9 months its started again to the point that we all dread friday nights. He isn't physically aggressive, but hes verbally abusive to me , and intimidated the children by stomping about and behaving aggressively. Awful situation and I know it will be tough before life gets better.
I need to get money sorted before I can do anything else. I checked and I wont qualify for benefits other than CB . DH knows I've had it.