DP's ex

[cyrilted]

Due to issues with DC's my DP spends an abnormal amount of time with exP - think a couple of full days together each month. This isn't going to change anytime soon and something I know to accept. However exP features very heavily in conversation with both DP and MIL - always brought up by them, although never favourably for various reasons. It drives me mad, I just don't want to hear constant talk about her. How much would this annoy you?

I'm afraid it's part of being in a relationship with a man who has children with someone? However, I don't see a need to spend full days with her/them. Is there any particular reason?

As long as they're not raving about her, I don't think I'd be too annoyed. Part and parcel of dating a man with DC's.

I'd be wondering if they'll be talking badly about me in front of the next GF, when the relationship is over.

RLEOM - there's a very good reason but it's really outing so I best not say. I completely understand why it needs to be this way for now.

Sandy - we're engaged to be married so I don't envisage that happening!

I guess it gets to me as my mum would never dream of banging on about my ex to my partner as she wouldn't want to annoy him.

Sandy - we're engaged to be married so I don't envisage that happening!

I'm sure everyone getting married believes that too.

My point is when you get a MIL talking to her DS about his Ex on a fairly regular basis in a negative light, it's not great.

My DB is remarried and my DM would never speak in a negative manner about ex SIL. If they need to talk about her, they can save it for when you're not there.

As you're getting married, I guess this will be a part of your future...at least you've seen it as it is...it won't be like all was good and they suddenly change post marriage.

Shitty from both your fiancé and his mum that they have to be so tediously bitchy.

I find a quick way to nip this in the bud is, every single time he mentions her name, say who? and then oh! Forcing them to repeat the name every time brings home to them how much they are saying it.

This would really piss me off.

My MIL actually calls me by my DH’s ExW name (they have been divorced 8 years and separated longer after a v short marriage). She even mixes our dogs name up with exWs dog that she had for like 10 weeks more than 5 years ago!!

She also likes to chit chat about her life. Irony is she actually hated her so much during hers and DH’s relationship that she barred her from the house! Now they’re besties.

I think she likes to be contentious. Fortunately DH never joins in. If he did, we would not have gotten married!!!

Are you invited on these bonding sessions? TBH I think it’s more confusing for the kids than understanding both parents now have separate lives.