So I got drawn into a text conversation with my ex. I know I should not have allowed it to happen. But he claimed once again that he is always there for me and the kids. He claimed to only have their best wishes at heart even though he finds it a struggle to spend more than 5 hours a week with them and expects me to make plans weeks in advance whereas he can just cancel on a whim, or expect to see them at an hours notice.
He accused me of being abusive when I to,d him dc were all tired and didn't feel like sitting in a restaurant this evening. So I called him a hypocrite and listed various forms of abuse he had inflicted on me, one of which was sexual abuse. His response was "If I didn't stop at the time I apologise, I didn't know you were hurt by it. My sincere apologies." Just that. He raped me the last time we had any sexual contact which is what he is referring to. Dismissed it just like that. I'm a little drunk right now. I'm so angry at how he dismissed it, minimised it so easily, I just feel as though I can't breathe all over again. I know he did it. And do t know why this is tearing me apart how it is.
That's all
I have had a couple of glasses of wine. Probably should t have