Tips from Single Mums?

[Wantaway]

Looking for some help and tips from single mums as I am about become one? Things like getting ready in the mornings with 2 little ones (5 and 18 months), bath times, bed times, organisation hacks?
Anything really?
I want our home life to remain as calm as possible. Currently, the youngest is very clingy and I'm not entirely sure how I am going to get ready/cook/clear up/put eldest to bed etc when she usually has one parent's attention during these times.

Try to get as much prepped the night before as humanly possible. Clothes, breakfast bowls, bags at door, keys near bags etc. The more you prep, the less you'll forget.

Also, you'll cope, we all do. You will look back in a few months and think wow! How did I get through that! We are stronger and more resilient than we give ourselves and our kids credit for.

“Do one thing now that your future self will thank you for” is a rule I really try to live by.
It can be as simple as prepping dinners to investing in myself.

Also embrace it, enjoy it and try not to feel it’s a big negative.
I’d also say be extra vigilant and take things much slower when dating.

Organise on the weekend for the week ahead. Don't stress about pasta tea or something thrown in the oven. The kids will want to be with you and will feed off your vibe so be as calm as possible and drop when they sleep. Online shopping. Sleep when they sleep. Good luck!

Make it easy on yourself for a start. To begin with, forget what you should be doing or what anyone else is doing, so what works for you.

Scrambled eggs on toast work for tea if you’ve all had a decent lunch. Bath them together and do stories together so you can whack them in bed at the same time (older one can lie awake and read for a bit if not ready for sleep). Do clothes, bags and lunches at night. Never ever let laundry pile up! Check the laundry basket at bath time and put a load in then any time there’s enough. Then by the time you’re finished with bed time you can stick it on the airer or in the drier and you’ll always have clean clothes if nothing else. Buy a monthly online supermarket delivery pass and make an order for the same time every week. Far easier than taking children shopping. Buy slightly too much so if you can’t be arsed one week or get ill you have stuff in. Make sure you always have Calpol etc in the cupboard as you won’t be able to nip out easily.

My top tip for the mornings if your 5yo is an early riser: put out their cereal in a bowl with the right amount of milk in a little jug next to it - on the table where they will eat.

They can go down on their own and assemble and eat breakfast without your involvement.

It was a game changer for me with DS.

Make sure to have Calpol, adult paracetamol, uht milk, tea bags and an option for a quick tea in the cupboard (like pasta and a jar of sauce) so when either of you are Ill you can at least have medicine, a cup of tea and some hot food without having to get out to the shop.

If you can afford a cleaner get one. I had one for 2 hours a fortnight and it was a game changer.

My kids were the same age when I became a lone parent. Definitely shared bath time and bedtimes/story. Don't feel guilty about using the tv to give you time.

I used to do something with them all the time. I felt guilty if we didn't have jam packed weekends. If I could go back I'd give us all more downtime.

Don't forget about you. Have catch ups and nights out. Invite friends over.

Mine are now 16 and 18.

Slow cooker dinners. Feed the biggest dinner of the day at lunch time.

I agree with the TV/tablet time and yours are the prefect age to institute strict screen rules - so mine are allowed TV after breakfast if they’re dressed, and on weekend mornings while I snooze, but when I say “screens off!” that’s it, they’re off, and that’s the norm. I definitely use screen time for some peace and quiet/me-time, but I also make sure we have proper screens-off periods where they’re expected to play and entertain themselves (mine are a bit older). This means they really know to make the most of screen time and don’t badger for it too much. And they’re used to having to make their own fun too.

When I was a single mum it was all about the prep the night before.

I don't know where that lovely organised person went. I used to be amazing at prepping dinner the night before and laying out clothes ect. I'm absolutely crap now I'm not a sp and flap about for 10 minutes looking for my keys every morning.

A packed lunch dinner is a life saver. On a night when you want to take your foot off the pedal, say Friday, give them a packed lunch for their dinner. And make it in the morning.

When you can time it, make the main meal for late afternoon, then a bit of toast is tea. On days like this a banana and packet of pom bears is a snack lunch. It ticks the box.

Always have a gold coin for the tooth fairy.

Slowly build up a stock of the basics, bin bags etc.

Always empty the bin before it needs it.

Extra small stuff like stamps.

Freeze milk.

You'll do it just have to be super organised
Once I get the kids to bed I literally iron all the clothes an have them laid out ready
Talc and towels at the side of the bath fresh an ready to go in the morning with the nappy an underwear with the clothes
Bags packed for the day ahead and snacks prepared in the fridge
Cereal bowls with the choices out on the breakfast bar to choose from
And I clean up an get a shower then I'm ready to just get up an get dressed really then sort the kids
Mine are 2 and 3 they get a bath in a morning as their so groggy otherwise and then their in bed by 7pm. They settle down with supper and milk at half 6 and watch in the night garden
I also have one on the way and my 3yo is disabled so he is very hard work atm but. I find it easier doing it on my own then when their dad was around !!!

As for the tea an clingy baby. Sit her in the high chair an give her some toys whilst you clean up or make tea then when you put your oldest to bed I used to sit mine in the oram with a bottle and some baby tv / nursery rhymes

Kind of need to set boundary's with clingy ness now your on your own though! Hard as it is it's better for you both to be more independent!
Your guna be just fine so don't worry. You have MN for help!! Cxx

Oh - Amazon subscribe and save. I do it for loo roll, kitchen roll, hand wash, coffee pods, washing powder, kids vitamins etc. You sign up and they deliver stuff every month/two months/whatever you choose. You get 15% off if you have more than 5 items in a month and they send you an email when they’re preparing it every month so you can log on and take stuff off if you don’t need it. Super easy to cancel things too. I never ever run out of toilet roll.

• Batch cooking to freeze so you're not having to prepare food from scratch every night.

• Iron and lay clothes out the night before

• Aim for an hour earlier with the kids bedtime if possible or you won't have any time to yourself; take advantage of the winter darkness.

• Stock up on non perishable items when they're on offer.

Internet shopping for EVERYTHING.

Get an Amazon Prime account for free and quick delivery. I buy everything on there from presents to DIY things. Even birthday cards!

Som great tips. I am writing them all down so keep them coming. I hate shops so already do internet shopping for everything! 🤣