When do you tell your DC that you are dating?

[MoreNiceCereal]

I split with my ex 7 months ago*, although our marriage was dying a death for years before then. I kept at it for various reasons, none of them good enough it turns out, and am happy it's ended.

I never intended anything serious with dating, just a bit of fun, a bit of a not-mum life, but met someone really nice who lives far away so we are doing the long distance thing for now. All good with him. We don't see each other regularly, but keep in touch with WhatsApp, etc.

My DC are still dealing with the split, and I don't know how best to handle things wrt telling them I am dating. I have zero intentions of introducing anyone, at least for another six months or more. But for them to at least know he exists? We've been dating for two months, so it's obviously very early days.

He is a single father to two children and has dated before so is more comfortable sharing the fact with his DC, so they know I exist. But I haven't had any contact with them, and don't intend to for a while yet.

I just don't know how best to handle this sort of thing. Everyone is different, obviously, but I'd be interested to hear various perspectives/experiences.

*I appreciate many will consider this a short time to wait but it is working for me, especially since it's a ldr. We are taking things very slow.

I am going to be vague about my situation as am just about a year into my LDR.

What I have learned is that the slower the better as they are potentially going to be further de-stabilised just by the thought of, nothing to do with actually meeting your new partner. They will have fears and/or fantasies and hopes of what this means for them.

Only you know when it is the right time to say I think.

Sorry op it automatically re-wrote my opening sentence! Was trying to say I am further along in my situation!

Thanks. My instincts are to wait and then wait some more. Springtime at least....

I think if your children aren’t coping well with the split and you’ve only been seeing him 2 months then there’s no need to tell them. The only way (if I was in your situation) that I’d tell my kids is if things were getting serious and you were starting to talk about moving in together, then they would have to be introduced. No need to know otherwise, it’s your relationship.

There's no real chance of moving in together for a very long time yet, lots of logistics involved, and we both have DC full-time so that's a huge, huge deal.

It's your relationship - this is a good point.