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Relationships

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Original poster

Dating

8 replies

Uhu · 27/09/2004 14:44

How old were you when you started dating? I was quite late (29 years old). I had a very strict upbringing and as I was not allowed to go out at all, I buried myself in books. Even when I went to university, I was not allowed to leave home so went to the local one just 3 miles down the road. I reckon I must be the only person to have not dated at university. I did not see the point whilst I still lived at home.

Anyway, met my first and only BF at work, dated for several years, married and now proud parents of twin DS. I was just wondering how I will react when they start to show interest in opposite sex. Will I be just as strict as my parents? Personally, I do not want them dating until they are 16 because I don't think children that age are mature enough to handle the upsets etc.

OP posts:

Mum2girls · 27/09/2004 14:54

I think you're upbringing is untypical.

I had an Irish Catholic upbring, went to an all-girls school run by nuns (which I detested although I had plenty of friends). I started dating/smoking/drinking behind my parents back from the age of about 14/15 as they told me I couldn't see anyone till secondary school was finished (aged 16).

So, speaking from my own experience, I'd be cautious that an over zealous approach to strictness may invoke a rebellious response.

Fizog · 27/09/2004 14:56

Do people really 'start dating'? I think when we were about 14-ish people started snogging boys at school/local discos etc... people 'went out' with each other but I wouldn't call that dating.

I think you only 'date' once you're an adult - I think it takes on a whole different meaning.

I've only started 'dating' since I had dd and (unfortunately) I've had lots (too many) relationships before now.

Mum2girls · 27/09/2004 15:33

You're right Fizog - when I said dating, I meant going to discos and the odd party (of friends with more liberal parents than mine)and snogging. Took it all very seriously at the time tho....

Mum2girls · 27/09/2004 15:34

You're right Fizog - when I said dating, I meant going to discos and the odd party (of friends with more liberal parents than mine)and snogging. Took it all very seriously at the time tho....

Mum2girls · 27/09/2004 15:34

Oops

KateandtheGirls · 27/09/2004 15:40

I never really did the school disco, snogging with teenage boys thing. My first boyfriend was when I was 16, and he was 26, and the relationship lasted 2 years.

beansmum · 27/09/2004 15:53

my parents were really strict until i was 18ish and it didn't work at all. i still did all the things everyone else was doing, they just didn't know about it. ds is still tiny but in the future ithink i would rather know what he was up to than have him sneaking off behind my back.

Original poster

Uhu · 27/09/2004 16:06

Yes, I see what you mean. I guess it's all very well having an ideal of no dating until 16 but it will probably lead to them not being honest with you about what they are up to. I must make an effort not to be like my parents!

OP posts:

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