Hi all,
I've posted before months ago when my husband continued his affair after I kicked him out of our home back in March. Fast forward to August and he started to crawl back. Long story short he had a bit of a breakdown and kicked ap out and finished it. Said he couldn't continue with the battle because he's never wanted her but I could never forgive him and it was easier to continue with her than face what he done and threw away. He has since started counciling and is very remorseful. Answers any questions I have and says he'll wait for as long as it takes. He'll earn my trust back and prove to me he's 100% committed and sorry. He keeps saying how sorry he is for hurting us and putting us through the torture of his actions. My therapist has said word for word what would happen, (midlife crisis apparently) but he didn't see him getting himself help of his own free will which is a great step.
Here's the big problem, I would love to consider it because we had a fantastic relationship for 19yrs and it will take a really long time and very slow. But my kids will flip if they find out I'm even speaking to him. My daughter 17, hasn't spoken to him in months and has no intention to. She has said if it came to it I'd have to choose between her or her dad. My son 13 gets on with him and sees him a lot but is very protective of me and is horrified if we have a conversation. We were all hurt very much and he chose her ow over his kids a lot over the past 7 months. Let them down consistently by not showing up or lying all the time. I will not choose him over my children if it came to it. I have told him he has to fix it with the kids 1st and keep texting our daughter every day. Even sit them down and tell them what he wants but daughter won't even sit with him. Has anyone god any advice or been in a similar situation regarding the kids. I think I can forgive him if he works really hard for it.