Mourn the death of my marriage every day....

[Cherrypop99]

3.5 years divorced and I HATE to admit it but I STILL think about my ex husband every day and even dream about him. It's doing my head in and I just wish I could move on (his choice, not mine to end the marriage).

Would anyone else admit to still mourning the loss of a long relationship?

Hi
I’m in the same position it will be 4 years for me this coming March !
I torment myself daily and feel like I have gone right back in time as far as moving on , it’s crazy and it hurts like hell.
I don’t know the answer all I can think it might be is the fact my exh left out of the blue for OW
I take it a day at a time still, I’ve also had an 18 month relationship that’s now over , I had been on my own for 2 years before we met so thought I was over the worst but I still deep down mourned the loss of my exh and what I thought my marriage was !
Your not alone maybe it’s normal and we are hard on ourselves because everyone thinks we should be over it by now.
Take care it’s hard but I’m sure we will get there one day x

11 years on and I'm getting there

10 years, @Cherrypop99

I cried for 7 of them. Gosh, I was sad.

But our grief shows that we loved and can do attachment and loyalty.

Ex is on to soulmate #4 and literally replaced one with another. Even the children say 'Can't you live on your own for a bit?'. No, he can't. Its all transactional.

But in the end you do get happy and content.

Maybe it's time to get some counselling if it's still affecting you four years on.

Funnily enough, I have been thinking about this too. It's only coming up to two years for me but he broke up with the the OW a couple of weeks ago and I guess that has got me overthinking things and now I am feeling a little less angry, I am starting to feel sad again.

I could never take him back after the damage he caused but the truth is, we get on great...always have. We spent time together yesterday for something our daughter was involved in and our son was so happy to have us both there, it was heartbreaking really.

I just have to keep remembering what he did and how his actions have had long lasting consequences. I couldn't forget, even if I wanted to.

Hi op

This link may be helpful. Might be worth looking into complicated grief.
www.yourtango.com/experts/drkarenfinn/how-to-deal-with-grieving-after-divorce-signs-complicated-grief