Dreading Xmas *Trigger warning*

[Theendofmyrope]

Fucking awful year as DD raped, trial a few months ago and not guilty verdict. This will be my first Xmas without my DH in 12 years as marriage broke down after trial. Serious MH issues since then.. Very little money. It will be just DD and me on Xmas day. I am worried it's going to be awful... so different to how it usually is. So much pressure for everything to be perfect. I dread seeing the Xmas adverts on TV. Used to love Xmas now I just feel empty and emotionless. I just dont know how to 'do' this. Anyone else facing their first Xmas alone?

What a crap year you've had OP, I'm so sorry.

Maybe this year instead of feeling the pressure to make it an Xmas to live up to previous ones or the stereotypes on TV, use it as a break. Just a day to spend with your DD, eat what you want, do what you want and take refuge in each others company

Not the same but I am facing my first Xmas without a very close relative who died this year and I'm not looking forward to it either.

My advice would be not to place too much pressure or importance on it. See it as just another day (but with a roast dinner included!) and that way you won't be disappointed. With no expectations you'll just make a new kind of normal.

Very sorry to hear about your dd and your marriage breakdown.

Would going away somewhere together be an option?
A cosy hotel in the country, perhaps?
Somewhere snowy in the mountains?
Some old friends?

I just cant afford to go away @CallmeAngelina I did think about it. Yeah I guess zero expectations. I close friend of mine has kindly said to come over to hers later in the day but I just feel we would be imposing as she will have her whole family there. Maybe I should just neck a bottle of something and grit my teeth. I want the day to be nice for my DD as she LOVES xmas. I suppose I dont want to be a let down. Sorry to hear that @TubbyMcTat77. Xmas seems to make things so much worse when its supposed to be such a happy and fun filled time

Sorry to hear about your terrible year. Sounds very difficult for both you and your DD.

Have you asked her what she would like to do?

I guess if I was in your situation I would make sure we had all our favourite foods and drinks, and just take the time to chill and recoup. Watch some feel good festive movies, and just spend time together.

So sorry you and your daughter have had such a tough year.

What age is she? Can you have some luxury’s, like a pjs and not chocolate night on Christmas Eve? Watch some fun movies, national lampoons is always a hit. Start some new traditions.

Are you sporty? Parkrun’s usually take place on Christmas morning. Or if that’s not for you how about trying to cook a Christmas dinner between you? Get all the instructions set out play Christmas music and try not to burn anything?

I would be careful about downing too much booze when you feel that way op. Just try to inject some nice little treats. A lovely Xmas film together. A Christmas Eve takeaway. Some games you could both play together.