I've been single since I left my husband several years ago. For years I was looking for someone else, wanting to be in a relationship, feeling I was missing out on life because I had no one.
I don't really know when this changed, but back in May I realised I fancied a guy from work and all I felt was dread and a hope that it would eventually go away! I told a friend about it and she said, "But don't you want to meet someone you can go out and about with, stay at home with, and have companionship with?"
And the answer was yes. But at the same time it all seemed a huge palaver. Meeting someone, going out, would we be compatible, did I love them, did he love me? Blah blah blah.
I feel I prefer my own space, and to do what I want without having to think about someone else.
Maybe it's because I had such an awful marriage, who knows.
I'm not the only woman in my family that's decided their relationship with themselves is most important. It seems many men are put off by women getting on with their lives and doing what they want.
So I guess my position is that I would consider a relationship, possibly, but I'm not going out of my way to change a great deal in order to have one. Doing what I want is really important to me now I don't have a spouse who did his best to brainwash me into thinking what I wanted was stupid.