Drifting away

[Stargazing12]

Have lived with dp for 3 years. Last 18months sex has slowly declined to nothing for last 4 months. Very little physical affection now. Says he doesn't have those feelings . We get on really well on a day to day basis and have been on holiday and had a great time but sane problem. Says we've become friends and drifting apart or he is. He acknowledges how hard I try. I look after myself and keep fit so i dont understand his problem
I've said I'll leave , because I'm so frustrated with the situation. He says if in not happy theres nothing he can do. I'm finding it so hard to break up. We are in our 50s.

He doesn't look at you in that way anymore. It happens. You can stay together as friends if you want, or you can move on and find someone who does look at you in that way.

Would he go to a counsellor? Some have expertise in sex issues so that may help you both. I think it's worth trying that first.

@LifeBeginsNow they were only together 18 months before the sex started to decline.

Why is everyone so quick to mention counselling when he's said himself they're drifting apart?

I've suggested a medical check up or medication says no. I doubt that he would do counselling.
I not being vain but I look after myself and exercise every day and would be considered attractive.
I try hard in the relationship and we do adventure stuff that I organise.
I dont understand his problem.

I would give up trying to understand him because he will never give you a straight or honest answer. This is on him and is not a reflection on you as a person.

Leave and when you do this have no further contact with him.

Relationships should not be such hard work honestly.

I've tried to talk to him numerous times to get this negative feedback and then he calls me darling and my love what's that about?

I agree it is early days into a relationship to need a counsellor but the OP said she didn't want to give up.

I don't think this is something they are going to fix by themselves so an impartial counsellor may help. If the relationship is unsalvagable, they can be guided on the split.

I really don't think hed do counselling. Hes a typical bloke. It's so frustrating because I cant understand him . I asked is it just me re the physical stuff or generally says he doesn't know