Don’t know what to do about this date tomorrow

[TashieWoo]

Second date with someone I met online is meant to be tomorrow... we got on v well when we met a couple of weeks ago (I had to cancel the date arranged for last week because of work) and spoke on the phone a few times before we met and since then, with a few texts every day. All good so far and he seems (seemed?) really keen. I haven’t been OTT in the slightest, he is 90% the one to start a conversation.

Tomorrow I have got us tickets (not that expensive) to an activity that I really enjoy that he has always wanted to go to. It was his birthday last weekend and I got myself a big new job last week so it’s a bit of a celebration. He has kept saying how much he’s looking forward to it.

Today I didn’t hear from him all day but that’s ok... he doesn’t always text in the morning. At 8.30pm I messaged him a screenshot of an app you can download re the activity and he hasn’t responded which isn’t like him.

I don’t know whether to just cancel tomorrow and see if I can get a refund, I feel like a bit of a mug really. Any words of advice?

Way overthinking. Just message him, confirm plans and get on with your day.

He just said he was going to get onto it... I know I’m being ridiculous... I’ll message this morning.

I think the insecurity isn’t helped by messages from a girl coming up on his phone when he was showing me some pics when we met. From what they said they were clearly from a tinder girl in the early stages, I made nothing of it and haven’t mentioned them since but he was clearly uncomfortable with me seeing them and made up a few excuses about work messages coming through on his phone etc. He isn’t doing anything wrong but still... it isn’t nice to see.

Aaaah you sound like me OP- I can't be doing with the Tinder style of doing things either!

@KnickerBockerAndrew I know I don’t have the time or inclination to date more than one person at a time... I have a full life and this isn’t a hobby for me!

I was expecting people on here to say things like ‘he’s just not that into you’ and that I should bin him off, so I’m glad in a way it’s just me being silly.

@TashieWoo unfortunately it's how modern dating is. I have now been with someone for six months and at the start I hated that he was dating other women. I was chatting to other men too but didn't really want to.

Join us on the dating thread if you want, it's lovely and supportive.

What does ‘going to get on to it’ mean?

This relationship and you sound like a lot of hard work, he doesn't message you back straight away, you get paranoid, he then messages you and you think the best to wait till he messages you again.

You just seem nervous that it might not work out in the end - but that's the score, that's just how it is, at this early stage no one knows what's in store for you, and this is precisely why people are seeing more than one person. Relax and try to enjoy it - surely that's possible EVEN if things don't work out in the end?

Did the date happen?

Sorry OP, but you seem like hard work. People don't have to be at the beck and call of their phones.

I hope you’ve had a lovely evening and all has worked out fine

Did you go OP

Hope you had a fun date OP! I hate that beginning part of dating, I always get anxious too. Try to relax and go with the flow if you can

*Everyday The app, I think

@rylanpop don't be so bloody rude.

Thanks for the messages and sorry for the late reply, yes the date happened and we had a lovely time! He seems keen and we get on brilliantly so so far so good, I just need to try and relax he’s been in contact today and all good, planning date #3.

Yeah!
So glad it well.
Relax, chill and enjoy!

Ocht I do enjoy a happy ending

Great!

Really pleased it all went well. Hope you have lots of happy dates to come.

That’s great 👍

Thank you all... I just need to stop this silly worrying as it isn’t attractive and will come out somehow.