Advice needed - my husband and I have been together for many years and have three children. He has always been a difficult person to live with. He has OCD and wants the house spotless all the time. He is also very controlling but I think it's all linked to the OCD. He will criticise me every-time he comes home from work. It doesn't matter if I've been to work or busy with the children, his only concern is the tidiness of the house. At the weekends, we cannot go out until the house is spotless but he also sets unrealistic time limits eg we must leave the house in 45 minutes to avoid traffic (because the thought of traffic or too many people also stresses him out) - as it's quite difficult getting a family washed, fed, dressed and a house spotless in this amount of time it always results in him either going mad at the children or being rude to me. He frequently will call me names and criticise me saying I do nothing. Ironically I feel I spend my life trying to keep the house and everything else spotless but it's just impossible. What I'm finding really difficult now is that I just cannot be bothered to keep trying to make him happy anymore. I try to do things he wants but it's never good enough and I find it depressing. The longer we are together the more the greater the boundaries seem to stretch. He can be quite verbally abusive sometimes which is very upsetting. I don't want to be without him as I would hate for my children to be without their father but I've spoken to him many times and nothing changes. He can be a loving and generous person but I feel it's always on his terms.