Forgive and forget, is it possible?

[Onieeee]

In a relationship, second time round. Bit of a shit time the first time. Basically he ghosted me for no reason and has obviously apologised for it now, ‘made it up to me’ etc, but constantly stuck with the what if thought. No reason and everything’s going smoothly. Will this feeling leave? Should I call it quits? It’s a lot more serious this time but fresh enough I could probably leave without too much hurt. Help

I personally wouldn't, because I'd always know he was capable of ghosting me. Unless you had done something abusive, that's well shady. Even if he ghosted you after the first date, which some people think is acceptable, the fact that he's then decided to pick you up again when he felt like it suggests he is a user.

I thunk this hasn't gone away because your gut is nagging you. Trust it.

It was a few months in which makes it worse, for absolutely no reason other than he was in a bad head space which I never had a clue about. This time round it’s gotten more serious so I can see it ending up in tears, for me. I think you’re right, just needed to see it from someone else thank you

You probably had no clue because he's made it up. Making himself a victim (even if only of his own moods) is a classic ass-clown move. Even if it is true - he's someone who will disappear if he gets in a bad head space and you aren't, so you are not matched. Good luck, Oniee.

I’d not have seen him again. Why did he come back can’t find anyone else? Are you a last resort no woman needs a man at all let alone one who takes the piss

I dated a guy who did this every few months for a year. He was never going to commit because he just did not feel the same about me.

Save yourself the hurt and walk away now.

You’re all right. I think I’m trying to cover this over and make it ok in my head but in reality it’s not and honestly it was mean. He says all the right stuff but the gut feeling just won’t leave We have discussed it and he ‘explained’ what happened, but if that trust isn’t there I can’t keep it going. Thank you all it’s good to hear from people outside your circle

I stayed and tbh I regret it, my problem is as I've never let myself love him like I did before it happened, I guess to protect myself but the reality is a lonely place to be.

What does “a lot more serious” mean?

What was his “explanation” - did you 100% believe it ? Was reasonable and are there any concrete facts to confirm it? Though personally unless he was abducted by aliens there is no other situation where a text could not be sent.

Mostly in these situations he was pursuing a better offer that didn’t go the distance.

Maybe your gut is telling you that it isn’t safe even though he hasn’t done anything .......yet.

Did you meet online? Maybe he met someone else when he ghosted you.

I'd not have entertained him again. Someone who can ghost you is not a decent person. I'd never do it to someone, would you? It says a lot about his character and how he treats others.

You can do better than this flakey guy.

It’s been a busy few days, but popped back to say I done it. Head over took heart thanks everyone

Good for you. Hope you feel proud of yourself - you are worth more than that.

Great news OP, I agree with the others, I think you're doing the right thing.

I feel like a weights been lifted, no longer worrying about being ghosted again if I don’t receive a reply or a phone call fast enough. Go me

Well done on taking back control of your life.
As they say.... no trust = no relationship
Get out there and enjoy life!