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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Everything is falling apart

1 reply

AJB120 · 25/10/2019 12:10

I’m 21 weeks pregnant today,

My brother passed away suddenly and unexpectedly 5 weeks ago. As you can all imagine this has torn my family apart. My family are the most wonderful family and we are all so close and supportive, we are all helping each other. Since then my nanna has become unwell and is now going through tests for cancer. She’s not well at all.

This is all a lot to deal with and cope with especially when pregnant. This is our first baby and I’m trying my best to keep stress level down and take time to deal with everything. My husband has been amazing and so supportive towards me, baby and my whole family. I couldn’t fault him... untill last night.

Standard night out with the lads. Few pints on the local. He didn’t get home until almost 3am (fair play to that) but he had taken cocaine. It was all over his nose... when I questioned him he lied for 20 minutes and before admitting it. This has happened on several occasions for more than 4 years now. I hate drugs and would personally never so drugs myself but I understand that it’s his choice. What I can’t understand is how he can look me in the eye and deny it every single time despite the evidence (coke on his nose, rolled up notes and bags of coke).

This crushes me every time I just don’t understand why he can’t be honest with me. When I try and talk to him the day after he become quite cold towards me and avoids the conversation so after 2 days or so it’s all forgotten about.

It’s all a little too much to take at the minute and I’m worried about what the stress is doing to my baby!

OP posts:
fluffy71 · 25/10/2019 13:42

I'm sorry I don't have anything constructive to say except to let you know I am thinking about you and sending you a big hug for all the crap you are going through right now!!
I think you need to sit down with your partner and have an honest chat. Tell him how you feel and how important it is for you to feel rested particulary whilst you are going through a stressful time with your FOO. (family of origin). If he's taking coke, is he going to be a responsible father?

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