How many dates until you felt it was right/significant?

[User627]

How many dates until you felt it was right/significant?

Just wondering how many dates to give it when dating. I leave first dates feeling totally indifferent, wishing there was a loud connection where I could be sure about pursuing something. Is that too soon?

I mean is it too soon to be hoping for that

After my first date with DH, although I liked him, I wasn't sure how far I wanted it to go. He started texting me a lot and I wasn't used to someone being so attentive so I started to pull back a bit. By date 3 however, I was sold and the timescale from date 1 to date 3 was probably a fortnight.

What swayed you Ginger?

I was hopeful from date 1-3. After that I felt we were on the first stage of ‘something’ but we took it slowly and I guess it wasn’t until about a month, so 6 dates perhaps that we became ‘exclusive’

First date was on a Tuesday, second date on the Friday. Saturday he asked if he could call me his girlfriend

Our first date was like no other I've ever been on. We laughed until our cheeks ached, realised that we had so much in common, very similar in personable attributes, on the same wavelength, didn't want the date to end, so decided to go out for a meal at the end of the night. It was the most perfect first date ever....and subsequent dates have been wonderful too!

I'd say, I was amazed on date 1, date 2 sealed it. At 6 weeks all dating apps were deleted...on both sides. When you find someone remarkable, you'll know!

@User627 We had spoken online for a couple of weeks before meeting and I had enjoyed our chats but had been wary in case there was no spark. I was wrong and I realised over the course of the next couple of weeks that he was a genuinely nice bloke who was interested in me, was close to his family and shared many of the same interests and views as I did. There was no hidden agenda with him. Seven years on, I'm glad I didn't run away!

I saw it as a bit of fun for 6 months - then realised I'd fallen in love. That was 14 years ago and we've been married for 10 with 2 DC.

Hmm. I too had a great connection with my now DH on our first date, but (lovely as it was!) I would say that was unusual. Having done a lot of internet dating before meeting him, I would say give it maybe three dates? With texting and calls in between?

I really want that spark at the beginning! Meeting nice people when dating but I am barely interested in taking it further. Not sure what it is I am looking for

We’d been chatting online so I knew I liked his online presentation. Within minutes of meeting on our first date, I knew that was the real him. Halfway through we were planning our second date so we could do it again without nerves. By the time he’d walked me to my car and kissed me goodnight, there were definitely sparks!
I suppose after a month or so, we’d definitely moved onto when do we see each other next not shall we see each other again.

Went for a couple of drinks on the Monday, on the way to the cinema on the Tuesday he asked me to be his girlfriend. I laughed like a drain because we were 25 , he meant he wanted us to be exclusive. After about a week I realised he was the one, we decided to get married after 3 weeks.

Um ... maybe it's just me, but I think the answer is pretty obvious. Yes first date. First meeting. First 5 minutes. Probably first 13.8 seconds (apparently scientifically that's the max it takes us to know how close we want to get to someone).

I take a dim view of dates (that's just me), but I maintain the 13.8 second rule. If you're 'wondering' then ... it's not it.

(it shouldn't be hard!)

(the decision, that is ; )

If I don’t feel much then I don’t bother meeting again. But I haven’t felt anything for anyone in years.

Dh and I were friends first so pretty much 2nd date we were a proper couple talking about the future

After many dismal first dates, I turned up for our first date not expecting much but I fancied him straight away and we got along well. We’ve been together ever since!

It was very quick for me, (1 or two dates) but we'd been acquaintances, then friends, for a while.

I'd decide to stop dating about a year ago. Was totally bored and put off by it. 6 months later got chatting to someone on FB. Really liked him, but didn't exactly fancy him. We met and he was as wonderful, smart and funny as he had been while speaking.

By date 3 I fancied the arse of him and still do 5 months later. Still early days but we are boyfriend and girlfriend!

Also I trusted him from the moment I met him.

First date I knew I'd marry my now DH...ironically, we met on a hook-up site and my only intention was sex really. About 3 weeks later (having seen each other 2-3 times per week) I confessed that I had very strong feelings for him and that I wouldn't meet with him again as I was aware it was just a sex thing for him. Then he confessed his feelings for me since 'date' 1 had been the same. All good in the end

DP and I became friends over a couple of months then talked a lot online when we both admitted we liked each other and arranged a date. It went very well and we just didn't want to leave each other (we did) but I saw that as a good sign. Second time we met up for coffee and it just felt right and easy.

It's been 10 months and it's still the same and it gets harder and harder to leave each other and be apart. I think when you know you know.

Don't think there was ever a spark or defining moment, other than getting to know each other more and more over a period of several dates and liking each other enough to arrange another date each time and so on.

20 years and 2 DCs later and all is well.

I don;' think sparks are a prerequisite for a successful and happy relationship.