Partner loves baby not me.

[Deadkeni]

I really care about my partner and he's a good dad, but he thinks it's acceptable to be a couple that doesn't kiss, sleep together, hug etc and we barely talk. We're friendly and don't dislike eachother but hes not interested in me. He treats me more like a casual friend, not even a close friend.He's fine with that but that's not enough for me, however I really can't afford to live alone and I don't want to separate him and the baby, he really is a good dad and he wouldn't get to see her much if we lived apart due to his work hours.

I don't want to be in a celebait relationship with someone who doesn't care about anything i have to say. It's hurtful. I'm always lonely.
I don't know what to do. I have no family and nowhere else to go. I don't know how to speak to him about it. If he cared I wouldn't be in this position, actions speak louder than words. It's clear from his behaviour that he's only interested in the baby.
I think we could try living together as a plutonic family, but I'm not sure if he would accept that.

YOu don't say whether you work or not. IF you don't work, make it clear to him that you're not staying with him financially dependent on him, sacrificing your earning potential as it's too big a risk in a loveless relationship

You have to do this. Doing this is brave. But if he thinks / knows that you're afraid to rock the boat (when the boat is so mediocre) then he won't respect you and he has all the power.

Be brave enough to rock the boat because you deserve more than this.

@Deadkeni have you spoken to your partner about this? How old is the baby? It's totally normal to go through a phase where you insecure after the baby is born but without more info about him it's hard to respond.

What was your relationship like before the baby was born? Why doesn't he want sex?

Sorry you're suffering OP. Have you talked to the doctor about the way you're feeling? Could there be any post natal depression?

Hi OP I’m sorry to hear this.
It’s not normal.
Have a look at entitled to - it’s a website that can tell you what benefits you can receive as a single parent. Maintenance is extra from him.. Do you work? Do you have family you can go too. Are you still sleeping with him as if so you need to stop. Do not cook and clean for him either.
Do you have friends at all - can you start going out to mother and toddler groups to meet new people.
You have a life too - don’t let him dictate what you do and waste time with someone who doesn’t feel the same.
Keep posting ..

What has happened to make him like that?

Has he always been like this?
As others have said, look at entitledto and have a chat with CAB.
I would just tell him that you are no longer a couple.
He can date who he likes from now on and so can you.
You consider him a friend and that's it.
Then get out there and live your life.
You can live together but separately if you really have to.
Stop doing anything for him though.
He doesn't want a relationship with you so he doesn't get the good bits.
No more cooking, cleaning, shopping, washing, ironing - nothing!
He can do his own shit.
Do you have separate bedrooms?

Are you sure you don't have post natal depression? Has the stress of a new baby caused you to drift apart?

I had the same with my daughter's dad. I had PND, felt exactly the same way, so I left when baby was 3 months - the hardest time when you have a baby. I wish I hadn't as now she's 1 year, she's a joy and I'm sure my ex and I could've made it work had I not had PND.

My body changed, i changed, we were both exhausted and i was a mess, of course my ex didn't feel as enamoured by me! But now I'm in a better place and looking better mentally and physically, I'm sure my ex, like me, has regrets at breaking our family up.