Does persistence pay off?

[PossumBlossom]

Name changed as I like to every so often but I am a regular.

Does persistence pay off? I mean in terms of wooing someone, male or female. I don’t mean in a creepy stalkerish way.

You hear of guys who propose to a woman a few times before she says yes or those who are trying to get a date with someone.

Are there those who like to chase and those who like to be chased and eventually caught?

I’m just wondering because for me personally, I don’t normally change my opinion much once it’s set. So if I didn’t want to get together with someone, I don’t think them being persistent would make any difference for me.

I’m interested to hear your experience with being persistent or being on the receiving end.

Thanks so much!

popculturedetective.agency/2018/stalking-for-love-at-the-movies

I'd find it creepy if anyone kept trying to ask me out once I'd refused them. I can't really imagine how it wouldn't be creepy - them thinking that I was playing games? Or thinking they knew my own thoughts better than I did?

What would this non-creepy refusal to take no for an answer look like?

It’s difficult to describe as I would hate it too! Perhaps it just never happens.

It’s not wooing, it’s creepy!

If someone makes it clear they aren’t interested, that’s your answer. Keep trying and you look desperate.....

Personally it would make me even more determined to never date that person.

I guess it depends. Once during Uni a guy liked me and I was not interested at all....but a few months later I became interested.

Some people don't give others a chance. Its not always love at first sight (meaning attraction at first sight).

In fact, for me, I can objectively find someone good looking but have no interest in them. And develop a crush on someone out of the blue, when previously had no interest.

So if someone is asking you out, I always think give them a few chances (dates)...unless you find them absolutely repulsive :)

Personally I think it's creepy. If I'm not interested then I'm not interested.
There seems to be weird belief amongst a lot of men that women play hard to get and no doesn't really mean no and they must convince you to change your mind.

I really dislike that way of thinking so for me persistence, despite being told you aren't interested is disrespectful of someone's wishes.

I think this is the problem with films and tv, they make it seem like it's normal to keep trying and eventually the person will come round, but NOOOOOOOO! Surely it's just desperate, awkward and weird. Having said that, trying again several years later is fine, that's how me and DH got together hahahhahaha.

Amazing video TellItLikeItReallyIs

It's OK if the person steps back and is just there for them as a friend but it's rare in my experience men can get the hump if you aren't interested fair enough. I get the impression op that you are posting for some other reason other than just getting to know people's ideas. Most people wouldnt persist even if they felt the other person was giving them mixed messages as they have to preserve their dignity and the risk of getting hurt.