How do I do this?

[Ashspeed]

OH and his two DC live with me and my DC relationship has broken down and we are arguing all the time. Problem being I cannot make his 2 DC homeless and he has no friends or family he can stay with. OH is oblivious to how upset I am all the time and will ignore me when I say I do not love him. Cant be good for the DC to live in a house where the adults are arguing all the time. What can I do?

How long have they lived with you? Where did they live before that?

Do you rent or own? Whose name is the house/tenancy in?

How old are the DC? Are they in school?

They have lived here for 2 years. House is owned by my parents. I know I can get them all out with a few months notice but it I really hard to make 2 kids homeless when they have had such a difficult start. They are 11 and 12

They must have lived somewhere before they lived with you

As he has dc, your local council/authority have a statutory duty in law to provide accomodation for him and his children.

Are you prepared to let the dc remain living with you if he gets a room in a flatshare or similar until such time as he can find suitable housing?

They won’t be homeless. Their father will have to find a new home. What’s stopping him from renting or buying a home for himself and his children?

You'll have to be really firm or he'll never leave. As pps have said, its up to him to sort out alternative living arrangements.

I wouldn't offer to keep his DC while he gets accommodation for himself though - he'll be living the single life while you parent his DC. Sounds harsh, but they must all go together, and settle in a new place together. That's much better all round.

Problem being I cannot make his 2 DC homeless

You're not making them homeless - it's his responsibility to house his DC and he'll need to seek help from the local authority if he has difficulties with this - it's not your problem to solve.

Either he gave up a secure home to put his DC in a precarious position by moving into someone else's home in the context of a relationship, in which case, that's not your fault. Or he was already struggling to house them when you took them in, in which case you've given them 2 years of a secure home but it's still on him.

It's not unreasonable to give them notice so he will have time to make a plan.

Whenever I used to try to throw out my abusive, gaslighting ex, he would refuse on the basis he had nowhere else to go and make me feel unreasonable!

Your OH is a grown-up and if you think he can't look after his children, that's a separate issue but it doesn't mean you need to support him forever if you're no longer in a relationship.

Give them 1 months notice - TODAY!!!!
He is an adult with children.
It is HIS repsonsibility to house HIS kids.
NOT YOURS!!!
This is not working so it needs to end.
Does he work?
Does he contribute?
Does he do his fair share of household chores?
Where is the DC mother?
Where are his family?
He needs to contact the council and Shelter.
HE needs to sort this out.
Just get him gone.
It's having a horrible impact on YOUR OWN DC.
Don't allow this to continue.
Do NOT be passive in our life and that of your DC.
Take charge now and get them gone!
Notice in writing - they have to be out by 15th November and you will not be extended this time frame.
Please do this!!!!
He is taking the piss and you are letting him.
He is using you.
Can your parents get involved at all?