Did they like you that much if they moved on so quickly ?

[French8312]

Was seeing a guy I'd met through a friend for a couple of months, really thought he liked me a lot, thought this was the guy i'd been waiting for etc. He genuinely seemed to care about me. He moved 1.5 hours away for a job offer with better pay, which isn't even that far, then suddenly dumped me on the phone, saying it wouldnt work with the distance as he worked really long hours (chef) and seemed devastated as was I, telling me he couldnt believe he had had someone like me etc. I understood his reason.
1 week after that (we were still messaging) he admitted he'd met someone, 2 weeks on they already have their profile pics as each other, love hearts and the lot. We dont speak at all now.
When they move on so quickly, did they ever like you ? He seemed to like me a lot, but he seems to love her. I feel like I was the Ford Focus and now he's been offered a Porsche.
I'm not over it yet and cant bring myself to do OLD as im genuinely not ready to meet anyone else.
You could say he had emotionally checked out before we ended but he seemed so into me right up until the sudden break up.
What's the deal when they do this ?

feel like I was the Ford Focus and now he's been offered a Porsche.

Nah. You were the Acropolis and now he's at the Colosseum. He's a tourist. He's a superficial person. He's not who you thought he was.

I wouldn't be surprised if he'd already had her lined up.

This happened to me around 18 years ago. I was dating for a while and guy said he could not commit as his work may take him abroad. I met my dh a few years later and ex found me on social media. He was settled with a baby living in the UK as he still is now! There was no work abroad- he was fobbing me off. It made me feel like shit at the time but I laughed when he contacted me.

Some people need a relationship to validate themselves as a person. No reflection on you they just simply a fucking loser

Good riddance someone elses problem now way I look at it

Yeah, I suppose maybe I didn't know him like I thought he did. This may have been his plan the whole time.
It's funny as I remember he told me once 'i' ve never felt the need to be in a relationship ' LOL.
Seeing him on a picture with another girl is weird. It only feels like a minute ago we were together. I will heal with time

I know he has been there before as he has a friend there so maybe he did have her lined up..

Well it was a couple of months. You didn't really know him, he didn't really know you.

He moved away and it was out of sight, out of mind.

Says nothing about either of you really.

I guess so. I know a couple of months certainly isn't long but we spent a lot of time together and had a really strong connection. He just wasn't who I thought.

He hasn’t “traded up”. You were only together a couple of months, it didn’t work out and he simply moved on. That’s fairly normal after a short relationship. You’ve done nothing wrong and it’s honestly no reflection on you.

Thanks, it's just the way hes already got his profile picture with her etc. He never took pics with me or anything and he's not known her long.
True people are allowed to move on, just a week seems incredibly fast and it's just making me question what was between me and him.

And like I said the fact that it's literally a week later it makes me wonder if he's had her lined up before and that hed been contacting her whilst with me. But I will never know now.

I'd say he did have her lined up, probably even took a job there for her. If he has a friend there and had already visited the area before maybe he had more of a life there than you knew about.

just a week seems incredibly fast and it's just making me question what was between me and him.

Honestly? Probably as little as between him and the latest woman.

If he's the kind of person charging off into profile pic nonsense etc 5 minutes into a relationship it's not a good sign about the kind of relationships he has. I'd be breathing a sigh of relief.

Sounds like a serial love bomber.

Tbh my husband of 4 years was with someone else within 6 weeks. Once the decision is made people can move fast. Social media profiles mean absolutely 0 though.

Yeah, I guess some people move incredibly fast. He maybe just wasnt very invested in me. The day it ended I was sat at home crying I certainly wasnt out there trying it on with someone else..
Exactly he may have had this planned and hid it from me.
Every time there was a picture of him and her he was 'loving' it on Facebook, he never 'loved' any of my stuff lol.
It just makes me think of that whole i'm happy but I could be happier, he seemed to like me a lot, my friends even said, but it looks like he's already in love with her even though that is no reflection of me.
Anyway ive deleted all his contact details and nothing I can do now apart from let the pain subside and try and get my confidence back up.

Just chalk it down as experience.
It's shit but you've dodged a bullet.
Quite often social media is just one big propaganda show.

It maybe all about her.

None of it's as it seems.

Give it time.

Thanks I will :) still hoping he will 'come back'. But he probably won't and I shouldnt want him to.
When we were together everything was amazing, I know it was the honeymoon period but it was just wonderful.
But I will be ok :)

My most recent ex ended things out of the blue after 11 months. Said he didn’t want a relationship, wanted to concentrate on his kids etc. He’d in fact already met someone else!
Prior to that I ended LTR of 7 years. He was devastated (or so he seemed), didn’t want to split up etc. He met someone else within a month of me leaving. They’re married now
I don’t understand how people can move on so quickly, seems odd to me. Don’t know if it’s a male thing or not.

Some people are just acting a part even when they seem serious. You probably dodged a bullet actually, you're better off finding someone trustworthy and sincere. Good luck.

That's shit :( sorry to hear that. Yes some folk are amazing actors. I also find it quickly how some people can move on so fast. I get that sometimes you just 'meet' someone else, but seems kinda tacky and it makes it look like the previous person meant little or nothing. I guess some of it is just rebounds too. This kind of stuff is so common though :/

I think they move on so fast to prevent having to deal with the pain of a breakup. It’s insecurity, and the over the top love-showing is a further distraction from his actual feelings. It’s not healthy and you dodged a bullet.

You could be talking about my ex...a chef.

Went from his 1st gf to a fling which overlapped with me. We lived together and together 3 years 2 weeks after I moved out he moved another girl in. Engaged and a baby with her and last I heard split with her and was with someone else within weeks.

Some people are just so insecure being single. I wouldn't take it personally!

Youre right it may well be rebounding or cannot be alone for 5 minutes ! I probably have dodged a bullet !

@00deed1988 oh no, what is it with chefs 😂