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Original poster

I am been stupid

12 replies

Amycarl06 · 11/10/2019 06:14

So the story goes, I am in a relationship with dh for over 13 years and married for 7 we have 5 children together. He has always been a jealous person didn’t really like me talking to opposite sex and thought I would cheat on him, well he has now got new friend that he wants to do everything with but he is now calling a girl a best friend and taking her out shopping I’ve been saying I’ve wanted him to take me for years and got no, we have no money, I am working blah blah all the excuses, so he going in a couple of weeks and didn’t give me a second thought now I am thinking it really weird. I am not a jealous paranoid person but at the minute I am thinking some it is strange. I tried talking to him and he was like nowt going on she 10 years older she’s just a nice person I like spending time with her, you need to get over it I am best friends with her and her husband you have been out will us all I get. Yeah I have been invited out but only when I have said I don’t what you all thinking on this is this really weird or a i over reacting.

OP posts:
PlasticPatty · 11/10/2019 06:34

He's married, he doesn't get to have a good friend who is another woman.
So, he's on with her. What next?

Original poster
Amycarl06 · 11/10/2019 08:31

Thats my thought to he swears they nowt in it and says shes my friend too but he went yesterday for a cup of tea spent all day with her and he says she has invited me but I got of her when I said I popped to me mums o u should of come here to me thats not a invite that is u could of see new I was off work as she knows my rota and I said if its an invite she would text are u busy do you want. To come av cup of tea. Her husband was out too

OP posts:
hellsbellsmelons · 11/10/2019 08:41

I would not be OK with this.
Taking her shopping when he won't take you.
Fuck that OP.
Honestly, I'd tell him to do one.
Not just for this but for how he has controlled you since you got together!
Don't put up with this.
Take charge of your life.

Sallycinammonbangsthedruminthe · 11/10/2019 08:42

Op he sounds dreadful.It is not a friendship,There is more to this,He has commitments to you and the kids not her.Tell him it stops now right now or he can leave.You need to sort him out and her its just not on.I am really sorry you are dealing with this.Maybe have a word with her husband too and tell him whats going on I bet he feels the same as you.It is not normal though any of it....

Original poster
Amycarl06 · 11/10/2019 09:25

Just thought I would add, he is take my oldest daughter and her friend with is the womens child as they are same age so they won't be on there own but with their 2 13 year olds

OP posts:
Original poster
Amycarl06 · 11/10/2019 09:26

I am not okay with it and he spoke to him about it and he thinks its normal.

OP posts:
Original poster
Amycarl06 · 11/10/2019 09:28

Her husban don't seem all that bothered to be fair and I don't want to put it in his head either as they isn't anything going on but I say that and I aren't 100% sure.

OP posts:
RolyRolyRolyPoly · 11/10/2019 09:43

He gets to make friends if he is married whether male or female but taking her shopping and gushing about how marvellous she is, is the suspicious bit. It does sound like either something is going on or he is winding you up for kicks. Either way, he sounds like a knob!

Sallycinammonbangsthedruminthe · 11/10/2019 10:01

OP I am pushing 50 here and its amazing what people can get away with hiding in plain view of everyone around them.Either way he is bending over backwards for her sparkling company and not giving a toss for you and that is wrong on every level.You can struggle with the kids,housework and shopping alone whist he is with her helping her....what part of that is right?
In effect he is saying fuck you I am off to be other woman who means more to him than you do..he is choosing to leave you to spend time with her...she is at this moment far more important to him than you are ...I wouldnt put up with it .It might be a crush it might not but he is taking the piss out of you and the kids and thats not right.

SprinkleDash · 11/10/2019 10:15

Why did you have 5 children with someone who is possessive and jealous and thinks you’re cheating?? That seems crazy to me!

In my experience people who accuse others of cheating for no good reason are usually the ones who are doing the dirty behind their partners back!

baileys6904 · 11/10/2019 11:12

To be honest, I wouldn't be bothered about my other half going shopping with a female and the kids.
What I would be bothered with is the complete double standards that is being employed here, and the way he disregards you for shopping trips, and I think this should be more of a concern.
No way in hell my OH would tell me whi I could and couldn't be friends with, and vice versa it we go out and socialise and do things together. Theres also no way kn hell he would be treating another woman better than he treats me.
Is this the sort of relationship you would like your kids to have when they are older? Because they are looking at yours and will think it's normal, thus putting up with something similar when they are older.
Have a bit more pride and value yourself more

Original poster
Amycarl06 · 11/10/2019 14:49

So now he has said he will take me but a different day because I have gone on about.

OP posts:
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