Work relationships

[coffeeorange]

Just need to get some insight into this as feel I'm going a bit mad/doubting myself.
Met a girl at work around a year ago. At the time we didnt work in the same area and meeting up for occasional lunch was a break away from our own teams. I quite liked her and at the time it was just some company at lunchtime..
My close friend took an immediate dislike to her, I could tell and was taken aback by her reaction. I didnt bring it up and shrugged it off. I feel I'm fairly laid back.
This girl has had some traumatic events in her life which she has confiding in me. i did notice her being bitchy about people in her area, calling them fat, generally just being awful. She seems to cause trouble and go from person to person. I've only just realised. Now I realise I was just another of these people she seems to 'recruit' get taken in and now I feel I'm a target! She is now doing to me what she has described doing to others. I feel quite threatened now and I actually dont want to be associated with this. I feel I have a good reputation at work. How did I not see?

You didn;t see it cos she chose not to show you! Don;tbe so hard on yourself.Distance is key here and avoidance,Change if you can your lunch time and keep missing her due to being busy! You can be in control of this.There is no need for words just avoidance she will soon move on to someone else.As for what she has to say about you I wouldn;t give it a second thought.You will just be added to what I suspect is a very long list!! Let her say what she likes makes no odds to you,people who know you and respect you will take no notice and bat it off as her being on one again.Keeping fake busy when she is free is the best non confrontational way of dealing with the poisonous cow!

@Sallycinammonbangsthedruminthe
thank you! I'm trying to stick to my boundaries, not let things phase me. However I have told her things in confidence and feel she is cleverly and subtlety using it against me. In effect its bullying yes?She puts on an act and gets others she knows to surround her.Banging things around on her desk etc looking for a reaction. i did feel quite anxious. I feel quite scared of her and threatened

Dont feel bad about it but its a lesson to learn to get to know someone well first before confiding in them. She sounds quite toxic.

All you can do is avoid any contact with her. Ignore her at all costs! If she says anything about you most people will have heard her say things before and will have the measure of her and will not be bothered about what she has to say anyway.