"You'll never find anybody like me"

[Ami5546]

I met up with my ex today against my better judgement. He invited me to an event and I accepted. I shouldn't have.

I quickly remembered why he's an ex in the first place. This is a man who thinks he's superior to everybody else, doesn't want me having a voice or an opinion, he's misogynistic and paranoid/jealous to boot.

He used the event as an opportunity to drag up the past and criticise me (bare in mind this is him trying to get me back) so I cut it short and said ok I'm done here, cue him saying "see you don't care at all, I just wanted you to show me that you cared" and that he thinks I've been looking for somebody else.

As I turned to leave his parting words were "you'll never find anybody like me"

I wanted to retort with "narcissists are ten a penny" but couldn't be bothered wasting any more time.

Blocked him on the train home.

Why do they say that? Has anybody else been told the same?

I got told after I refused a 2nd date that it was my loss
It really wasn't

Should have replied, “That’s the plan.”, and left it there.

One word answer- good.

Someone said the same to me once. I just said "Thank f*ck for that" and never spoke to him again. And I meant it

Id have said "I hope not" and walked away. Narcissists seem to think they're amazing when really they're the bottom of the barrel 🙄

If anyone ever says that again say that's the plan I can do so much better

Upon reflection I wish I laughed and said that's the plan, but he'd already started swearing when I refused to agree with him and I didn't want a scene.

Ironically he's nothing special and I've had much better

Thank fuck....

I had a bf at uni who was a narcissist and big on coercive control. He did the ‘see you don’t care at all’ thing after I split up with him. Like the problem was me being heartless dumping him once he’d gradually taken over my life and stopped me seeing friends and family.

He’d wait for me and follow me home from classes or if I’d been out with friends (unfortunately we lived in the same house for a while). And no, I didn’t care at all, he was a psycho, would break into my room when I was sleeping and rant at me. He also threatened suicide. It was awful. I actually used to see him walking up behind me and I’d run round the corner and hide in a bush so I didn’t have to listen to his ‘you just don’t care’ all the way home.

When he decided to move out and go home for the summer he said ‘you’ll never have a love like this again’ I just thought, ‘too bloody right, I recognise the signs now and would never go out with someone controlling again’. 25 years later I never have!!

@Windydaysuponus I'm with you

Thank f*ck that

He sounds bloody unhinged professor, I'm sorry you had to put up with all of that.

Ours was a brief relationship of a few months but the red flags were a plenty. I think I met him today out of curiosity more than anything, but I'm chastising myself for going now - I really shouldn't have.

He wanted me to grovel and massage his ego and I was having none of it.

In a way I'm glad I did go, because he can be left under no illusion now that I really don't give a toss about him anymore.

He said I have an impenetrable wall around me, what he meant was boundaries.

My exh used to tell me this all the time. Or “you’ll never find anyone who will love you like I love you”. I was so beaten down by his coercive control - although I didn’t know it was that then - that i’d always end up in tears, agreeing with him, apologising to him and begging him not to leave me as I couldn’t be alone.
It was so satisfying when I found the strength to leave him, he trotted out the standard “you’ll never find anyone like me” and I was able to reply with “I don’t want anyone like you, that’s the reason I’m leaving you”.
We’ve been separated 7 years now. He got engaged about 2 years after we split and tried to drag me down with “look how I’ve moved on first, I told you you’d never find anyone to love you again”, I just shrugged and replied “maybe. But look how much happier I am alone”. He was furious he couldn’t get to me.
So, in short, a lucky escape for you OP!

Good on you, totheletter, so glad you ditched the horrible git and found happiness in yourself

I wasn't expecting to feel as flat toward him as I did today, things were quite intense very quickly and I was really into him yet when I was with him today I was able to see him without my rose tinted glasses on and felt absolutely nothing.

It has brought me closure in the sense that I can close the book being certain that there's nothing for me there.