www.theguardian.com/society/2019/oct/02/labour-mp-moves-colleagues-to-tears-with-domestic-abuse-story
I saw this on the Guardian website today. I am not sure why I am posting this, except that what Rosie Duffield said was so moving.
I have always struggled with my own experience of domestic violence, as it was largely coercive control, and so difficult for me to articulate my experience without sounding petty.
It also struck a chord as she doesn't fit the stereotype of a woman in this situation, and I don't think I do either, another reason I feared that people would not believe me and think that I was exaggerating.
But it's also the very small things she says that only someone who has been through this can really understand - the silent treatment, followed by finally being told what it is you have done wrong this time. Withholding information about salary and financial abuse.
I suffered all of this and still have to listen to friends to comment that 'I would never let my husband treat me like that' or 'why didn't you just say no to that'. But I was terrified of him, until I left. I still am, when I see him when he picks up the children, even though he is a coward and it's been nearly 5 years.
And her experience of one day realising you are smiling, and that you can breathe again.
The clip brought back lots of memories and feelings about my own experience, I think this speech is amazing and should be shared as widely as possible.
I would love to contact her and thank her for posting that. In fact I would love to sit and have a coffee with her and thank her, what an amazing thing to do.