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Relationships

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Divorce

3 replies

Thebear14 · 30/09/2019 07:23

Me and my partner are divorcing/splitting up due to them having an affair. I gave them a chance after finding out but then shortly after I found out they were back in touch with the person who they were having an affair with, telling them they can’t wait to see them. Things haven’t been straight forward from the beginning as they don’t seem to know what they want. Anyway they finally told me they don’t want to be with me, so that’s that. Things aren’t good any more to the point where we can’t eveb have a civil conversation. Initially they were willing to pay for a divorce but now they aren’t and won’t even pay half, because they don’t see why they should. I am planning on buying them out, with the hope I will be able to remortgage. The problem I have is that they have been renting a house for over a month but because I’m still waiting to see someonone about a remortgage they are refusing to leave the house because technically it’s still both of ours, which I agree with but it’s making an awful atmosphere. We also have an adult child who it is also deeply affecting and I don’t know how long either of us can cope with the atmosphere. I honestly feel so run down and don’t know how much more I can take of this.

OP posts:
IndieTara · 30/09/2019 07:34

Are you divorcing on grounds

IndieTara · 30/09/2019 07:35

Sorry pressed too soon!
Are you divorcing on grounds of adultery?
When I got divorced 5 years ago my solicitor said that usually the adulterous party pays all divorce costs.

Techway · 30/09/2019 07:54

Do you have access to joint savings? Do you have a solicitor? In the scheme of a divorce the costs won't be that high and it might help you to move on.

A divorce can get embroiled in conflict as parties dig their heels in so you have to focus on the end goal.
Your partner is able to stay in the house until a formal consent order so I think you need to get on with the paperwork so that the financials and house are agreed.

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