Sex

[linsey54972]

So I've been reading through posts from people feeling the same as me regarding basically feeling crap about ourselves..I've been with my partner for nearly 8 years I'm 39 so is he we have 5 kids under 6 which is hard work so I'd put the problem with lack of sex dont to that but when I know hes masturbating it obvs means he still has sexual needs it just makes me feel horrible unwanted an worthless knowing he would rather do that than make the effort to be intimate with me when I bring the subject up " I'm looking for an argument" I'm not I'm just sick of feeling so shit about it weve slept together 4 times in the last 3 months each time it's basically been about what he wants in bed .I know I'm not want he wants physically I obs dont do it for him .I'm not happy feeling like this .I love him an our family more than anything but I dont want to keep feeling so unwanted it's making me hate myself when I look in the mirror I feel disgusting an I really dont want to be that person I have no self confidence left I'm constantly doubting myself I feel ugly an fat every single day an it's getting so bad I dont eat just to try change the way I look quickly that's making me mentally feel a million times worse I cant say these things to him he just storms off or tells me I want a fight

Have you considered the possibility he might want you to feel this way?

Is he ...mean in other ways? Would you consider him a 'nice' person/a good human being?

Wanting to feel loved and feel tenderness and desire from your partner is normal and a valid feeling. So him saying you are spoiling for a fight for just wanting to talk...seems like it might be manipulative to me.

It could be like you said,he is no longer attracted to you. Or it could be that he is a cubt who wants you to feel unloved and shit about yourself because it makes him feel powerful from the sense of control over your self esteem. Sadly the later is more common than you'd think.

It could be he gas sexual hangups ect if his own and just doesn't have the decency to approach the problem head on so blames you... But that still isn't an excuse to treat you like shit.