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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Close friend drip feeding me?

4 replies

Chocoholic20 · 23/09/2019 14:25

Background: Friend and I have been friends since we were young, ages 14 or so.
We’re in our mid twenties now. After uni we both moved back home and saw each other every so often - maybe once a month. I have recently moved away to live with my partner.

So there’s a few things recently that have just been odd and I’m unsure if I should speak to her or let it go.
She’s had a difficult time and has fallen out with her parents recently and moved in with her boyfriend and his family. What’s odd is she sent me a text to say it had all gone wrong at home and that she’s moving out. I text her back and tried to be helpful and said I was there for her.

Then no contact - for around 10 days.

My last text to her was asking if she was alright and how it was going - no reply.

There have been a few times where she’s posted a photo of us on Instagram and said how much she misses me ect. And tags me in funny things on fb ect.

I find this odd because she is yet to reply to my concerned messages?

She messaged me last night saying it’s been 10 days since we last spoke and it feels like years. We’d usually speak everyday...
Proceeded to tell me how awful she was feeling about things and when I messaged back asking what had been happening ect, silence.

For more context I posted in our girly group chat about our annual Christmas meal to get dates ect and she’s ignored me on that too....

I’m abit peed off that I’m being ghosted by her tbh and confused.

Mostly because I think it’s just rude and I feel she is almost trying to force me into saying something.
I am quite upfront but as she’s obviously going through a tough time I have given her space but I’m really fed up with it now. I feel if I did say something she’d deny anything was wrong.

OP posts:
marvellousnightforamooncup · 23/09/2019 14:30

Have you tried ringing her, or sent a card?

Chocoholic20 · 23/09/2019 15:01

Yeh she’s not the type of person who likes to speak over the phone, wouldn’t really chat on the phone even when we were on normal speaking terms.
As for a card, lovely idea but I don’t know her new address as she’s moved in with her boyfriends parents. :(

OP posts:
MargotsBumpyNight · 23/09/2019 18:55

Maybe if she's having a tough time she doesn't have the energy to go into it all right now? The best you can probably do is just let her know you are there for her whenever she's ready. Ask if she needs a distraction, send memes, that kind of thing.

BoomBoomBoomLetMeHearYouSay · 23/09/2019 19:24

Maybe just try calling her?

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