Cant sleep... what should I do??

[Boopityboo]

I'm writing this post because my head is going crazy. 3 years ago after the birth of my 2nd daughter my marriage started to break down. We stayed together for the sake of the kids but in this time he had a male friend who came to stay with us a lot. I started to develop feelings for this guy. On my Birthday a 2 years ago we had a few to drinks and ended up kissing. Never told anyone but continued to flirt. My feelings for him got stronger, but I'm not sure if he felt the same. I distanced myself from my husband because of this and have never told anyone about my feelings for him. We finally decided to end our marriage 3 months ago. This guy is still always on my mind, still sees my ex but i miss having him around. Always wanting to msg him or see him but never plucked up the courage to actually tell him how I feel!! Today I saw him and the butterflies in my tummy were going crazy, I have not felt like that in a long time. I guess what I want to know... is should I?? Shouldn't I?? Tell him how I feel? Would it be worth it? Could a future be possible? I have never spoken to anyone about this before

It’s only been 3 month since your marriage ended concern yourself with your Children only’

I would tell him- worth a go. x

Before you start pondering 'could a future be possible' you need to formally end your marriage in the divorce court.

In any event, as Mr Marvellous is a not particularly loyal pal of your recent ex, you should proceed with extreme caution and refrain from handing it to him on a plate- making a move on him until you are legally able to consider yourself free to do so.

It seems you've become infatuated with this man, perhaps as a result of being in a less than satisfactory marriage, but it seems unlikely your feelings are reciprocated as he doesn't appear to have suggested that the two of you meet again any time soon.

It could be that he has a SO in his life but, in any event, I wouldn't advise anyone to declare their feelings in the way you describe before a relationship of some duration has been established otherwise rejection may cut to the quick.

If you should bump into him again flutter your eyelashes by all means and even suggest a drink sometime so that you can catch up or some such other face saver, but keep your feelings firmly under wraps until you are confident that he feels something for you.

Thanks all, woken up with a clearer head. My Husband is filling for divorce, he put himself on tinder 3 weeks after separating from our 11 year relationship! This Guy was the one who put a stop to anything happening because of my marriage, however he knew full well the reasons why we were staying together were not the real reasons. That doesn't make it ok though. An yer i suppose an element of it is because of the loveless marriage i was in and he could see it. But he was more supportive to me than my actual DH and my girls absolutely adore him. I know i need to take time to focus on myself before jumping into anything. Just seeing him yesterday brought up all those feelings again. An he did contact me last night to say that his loyalties have to lie with ex but he still cares for me as I've become a good friend too. He would love to meet, but I'm sure ex would have a few issues with that. Its completely understandable. I'm going to take a step back for now. Continue finding myself again and looking after my girls. I cant rule anything out, but for now he is in a relationship so I'm leaving it down to him.

Well that added bit on the end where you said he's in a relationship means you need to leave this well alone

He was in a relationship at the time too? If he was in a relationship and also your husbands friend....frankly he sounds like a piece of work! Avoid like the plague. He is clearly not a loyal bloke.