Children's friendships boy/girl

[PumpityPumpPump]

Hello!

Is there an age where boy / girl friendships stop or at least slow down.

DS is 9 and been best friends with a girl since they were babies. In the same class at school and see each other socially bi weekly.

Now they just seem to bicker, she said this, he said that, he is annoying, she is mean etc.

Friendship run its course? Just a blip? Girls mature faster than boys?

He seems quite sad about it all. 😟

My best friend when I was a little girl was the little boy who lived next door. We were basically inseparable until we were nine or so, but then we gradually moved to friends of our own sex. Our “break up” was fairly mutual but we remained friendly if you see what I mean.

We did in fact reconnect fairly majorly in the sixth form and hung out quite a lot, but his mates let on that he had said he was going to marry me and I was totally traumatised; I saw him as a brother.

We are actually still in touch in our 50s. I do sometimes wonder how it would have been if we’d ended up together, because we have always had this amazing trust thing.

They seem to ebb and flow. For a time when she was 11-13, one of my eldest's very best friends was a boy. These days (she's now nearly 15), they are still friendly but certainly nothing like as close. Similar patterns over younger years. I think part of it is the conditioning of this view in society that males and females can't 'just' be friends. Lots of adults tease kids ("ooh, how's your boyfriend" type stuff) if they have a close friend of the opposite sex, which must be offputting to the kids. Rather sad, really.

DD has 2 close male friends one she's known since nursery & one she's known since they started high school.

I think the secret to the longevity of these friendships (16 & 7 years) is that there was never any teasing from the adults or their friendship groups & there has never been any sort of romantic interest from either side.

Also, although I'm friends with the nursery boys mum & the high school boys dad is one of my best friends the kids were never "forced" to be friends because of this if you know what I mean. So I think that has helped them remain friends because it's been on their terms.

But 9 is around the age that boys start to find girls annoying & girls start to find boys annoying and they can start to focus on friendships with children of the same sex.

Puberty, hormones, social & peer pressure can all have an affect on friendships. Their own personalities are also constantly developing so they may not be as compatible as they once were & some friendships can just naturally end at this age for no particular reason.

DS always had female best friends although also had male friends but fewer. DD only had same sex friends. This never changed even once grown up

My ds8 has always been best friends with girls as he finds most boys too boisterous. I'm happy if he is happy.