Am I right to be upset?

[LittleMiss2011]

I had a date with a man on Saturday. He asked me to book the table at my local restaurant, so I booked the table for 7 pm. He told me that he would take a Uber and pick me up as he did not want me to wait in the restaurant alone. I offered to have a small drink/Aperitif in the garden then we would take another Uber to the restaurant.
We had some communication during the day on Saturday I asked him what time he would be at mine. He told me 5.30pm. I asked if he could come at 6 pm instead to give me time to get ready.

I organised a small drink with snacks, got the house fairly cleaned up.
5.55 pm, I received a message to meet at 6.30 pm instead. At 6.30 pm, he called to say he was going to be late as he was still waiting for someone to take some keys from him and there was bad traffic. He then suggested not going to the restaurant but for him to come to my house and eat the snacks that I had arranged. I told him no.
He knew all day that he was not going to meet me as planned, why not tell me early or even cancel the date?

It's Monday morning, I am on my way to the gym, but I am still fuming. I have blocked and deleted his number. He even dared to phone me yesterday to ask meet.

I need a good workout today, I stayed in bed most of the day yesterday, missed my gym sessions.

You're right to be a bit irritated. But he only suggested forgetting the restaurant, right? Because it was getting late? You could have just said "No, let's just meet there instead"?
OTOH, if this is a stranger we're talking about and you gave him your home address and suggested meeting there, he might have got the wrong idea.
If this is OLD, then a date is just as likely to be rubbish as nice. Best not to get so invested as to be upset if it doesn't work out.

I think you overreacted a bit!
Yes you are right to be annoyed and disappointed but staying in bed all day is way overreacting.

Fucking twat couldn't be bothered with a restaurant just thought he could go straight to sex.
But to be honest I would NEVER give my address to these people. Nor would I go to a restaurant until I knew them. It would always be a casual pub date, always inexpensive.
Nothing worse thanow being forced to eat a whole meal with some other plonker you disliked on sight. At least in a pub you can escape quickly.

Don’t invite strange men to your house no matter how well respected they are in your community. First date should be in a public place, ideally brief in case you just don’t click, and should be flexible enough to rearrange if something unforeseen crops up.

The blocking and deleting thing because he didn’t live up to your expectations on day one shows that you were over invested.

He had no loyalty to you and waiting to exchange some keys etc is a pretty acceptable reason to be late in my book. If it was for work would you think he should risk his job for a first date with an unknown woman?!

Your reaction that you’re fuming two days later because you missed your workout yesterday due to laying in bed watching TV implies that you’re way over invested in this already.

Next time, coffee first, or a quick drink. You can move on to dinner if you like afterwards but you don’t need to commit to a whole evening including aperitifs in the garden FFS. Chill.

Don’t invite strange men to your house no matter how well respected they are in your community. First date should be in a public place

If you read the newspaper or internet you should know that men who are well respected rape and assault women all the time. The conviction rate for rape is now minuscule, it’s now a crime with practically no consequences for the perpetrator.

If you are part of a small community you are even LESS likely to be safe - men know that the social approbation for women who complain is very severe and most won’t risk being a social outcast.

You need to be MORE careful that other women, not less.

Please don’t put yourself at such risk again.

Forget about him.

Do not allow strangers into your house.

He was a stranger.

Personal safety first.

Thank you everyone. I was more upset about the wasted time. It's not easy when you work for yourself, we don't have such thing as a "weekend" off. I am catching up for the wasted two days.

Your kinds words are encouraging. I also had a good workout this morning. I have a session with the personal trainer early tomorrow.

I was more upset about the wasted time.

So you wasted another day in bed?

You posted very similar in August. Is this someone different that you've invited round to your house? Did you not learn the first time?

MrsMaisel It was all "ladies" on that one too.

OP, you're having counselling but always seem to be having issues one way or another with men. You were having issues with one you were renting rooms out to. I'm wondering if you are with the right counsellor?

The former lodger just needed a free place to stay while he was in town. I told him that he could not stay in my house.

Don't invite strange men into your home. Why are you giving us a rundown of your exercise regime?

The best thing to do is hit the gym and work it out.

@Ravenmum, he was still in his house and it's the other side of town, so, it would have taken him at least 2 hours because of the traffic to be at the restaurants. This restaurant gets very busy at weekend and I don't really fancy sitting on my own. I had experienced the same thing before, I waited for a long time and it was uncomfortable.

I cancelled the booking just before 7pm.