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Original poster

The never ending circle

24 replies

KatiePricesLeftEar · 15/09/2019 08:02

Is it me? Challenged my partner when I found him going back to his ex's work to talk to her about 'ex-house' stuff, finances etc. I know he was there because a friend works opposite and sees his car. We parted, he stayed at his sisters, but he got his emotional shit together and we started seeing each other again, most of his stuff was in my flat still. So, we have had sex once since June. Twice I have suggested it since Friday but he finds an excuse not to, usually blaming me - you're tired etc. Er, no! Last night he orchestrated an issue and went to his sisters house. I have just been on the iPad this morning and can see went on Pornhub last night. I'm am beyond furious. He fucking went behind my back seeing his ex for months, I'm trying to trust him and he's just screwed me over!!! . WTF!

OP posts:
peachypetite · 15/09/2019 08:09

Why are you with him?

Original poster
KatiePricesLeftEar · 15/09/2019 08:22

Because, I thought I loved him. He is basically a good man that picks wrong choices. He has stuff at mine. He has stuff at his ex's. Why I don't know.

OP posts:
Original poster
KatiePricesLeftEar · 15/09/2019 08:23

But the sex issue. I don't get it. Why refuse me but go off to his relations house and wank on pork sites??

OP posts:
peachypetite · 15/09/2019 08:24

But he has cheated before? Your OP isn’t that clear.

MarthasGinYard · 15/09/2019 08:24

Well he's made his choice now

He prefers to sleep with his ex and has now replaced you with pornhub.

I'd bag up the remainder of his bits n bobs I think.

category12 · 15/09/2019 08:28

Sounds like you're wasting your time and energy on this man. Just drop him.

Original poster
KatiePricesLeftEar · 15/09/2019 08:42

No. He did not cheat sexually with his ex. He saw her at her workplace. He cheated emotionally though, trying to sweet talk her into holding on to his stuff and giving him money that she owed him

OP posts:
Original poster
KatiePricesLeftEar · 15/09/2019 08:43

He wouldn't have told me if I hadn't found out

OP posts:
LizzieSiddal · 15/09/2019 08:45

It sounds exhausting being with him. I wouldn’t have the energy to keep having to work him out.

You deserve a simpler life- get rid of him.

Original poster
KatiePricesLeftEar · 15/09/2019 08:51

I'm going to have to have the conversation aren't I?

OP posts:
AgentJohnson · 15/09/2019 08:54

I'm going to have to have the conversation aren't I?

No, you need to be saying goodbye. The only thing you’ll get from banging this particular brick wall, is a headache. It’s your choice.

peachypetite · 15/09/2019 08:56

This relationship isn’t going anywhere. Move on and find someone who treats you well. Wouldn’t even waste my breath having a conversation about the specific incident, just tell him it’s over.

FuriousVexation · 15/09/2019 08:59

Why refuse me but go off to his relations house and wank on pork sites??

Because having a wank is a lot easier and has a lot less pressure than feeling obliged to give your partner an orgasm.

If this has been happening since June, then I'd suggest he's either terminally lazy and selfish, or that he's just not that into you.

I'm sorry, that last bit probably sounds really harsh, but I can't think how else to phrase it :(

MarthasGinYard · 15/09/2019 09:00

TBH

No

Personally I wouldn't even waste a conversation

Original poster
KatiePricesLeftEar · 15/09/2019 09:03

No one has been harsh here. Thank you for telling me straight. Something he hasn't done has he? Dreading him coming back now. Dreading the next week when he tells me he loves me and can't wait to have sex with me. Its all a lie isn't it.

OP posts:
peachypetite · 15/09/2019 09:27

Imagine it was a friend telling you all of the above. What would you tell her?

SparklyMagpie · 15/09/2019 09:34

I'm sorry but "pork sites" 😂😂😂

MarthasGinYard · 15/09/2019 09:35

Pretty apt really Grin

Notcoolmum · 15/09/2019 09:50

How long was he with the ex.
What was the gap between him splitting up and getting together with you.
Did they own a house together. Are there kids involved.
Does he live with you. How long did it take him to move in.
Why are you checking his internet search history.

Original poster
KatiePricesLeftEar · 15/09/2019 10:21

With ex 16 years
Not really a a gap between relationships
Had house together
Moved in with me within 4 months
I check because I can

OP posts:
Original poster
KatiePricesLeftEar · 15/09/2019 10:22

I think he deliberately caused an argument so he could leave

OP posts:
PicsInRed · 15/09/2019 11:24

Good men don't continually make bad choices.
The bad man is bad because of the bad things he chooses to do badly.

That is the very definition of the "bad man".

Conclusion: He's a bad man.
In the bin with him. 🗑

PicsInRed · 15/09/2019 11:25

So you were the ow.

Does he have kids with her?
Kids with you?

If no kids with you, just flee like your arse was flaming and choose to make better choices of your own in future.

Original poster
KatiePricesLeftEar · 15/09/2019 11:47

Oh no I was definitely not the other woman. Please. I would not do that. I was a single mother because husband left me for an OW. My child is grown and I would not be the woman to do this to another. Oh no.

OP posts:
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