Is over

[Relationshipsajoke]

My relationship is over. I can’t see a future anymore. I have nothing left to give and nobody or nothing can make this better. I don’t want to do it anymore

You are perfectly entitled to end a relationship if it's not working for you.

Do you want to talk about it?

It wasn’t me that ended it. He didn’t even try

Then he wasn't the person you thought he was. Sounds like it had maybe been over in his head for quite a while before he broke the news to you.

Be kind to yourself. Most people have been there and can sympathise with that awful awful pain, it's like nothing I've ever known and I'd never want to feel it again. But now, okay, it's a long time ago but I love my life again.

There is life on the other side. Take it easy, do something just for you, concentrate on you (and maybe make a list of all the shitty things he did, to make you remember that he really wasn't god's gift).

You will be okay.

Oh sweetie I know that feeling, now it's time for you to heal, feel sorry for yourself for a few days, eat all the chocolate and takeaways, indulge in a bottle of wine (or a few beers) watch a few crappy rom coms and just let yourself feel like crap, don't rush yourself, your happiness will come back.. After a while just throw yourself into the bath and have a long soak, do your hair, nails and get the war paint on and go out with you pals. It will get better. How long was the relationship?

nobody or nothing can make this better.

Time can and it will.

Are you feeling safe though? The tone of your post is worrying me.

@MrsTerryPratchett I am safe, simply because I don’t have the guts. I want to end it. I really do. But I can’t. There are children involved that need me but I feel like such a failure. Another failed attempt at a family, more arguements and upset for rest of all of our lives because christmasses and every other thing will have to be shared, I’m already going through hell with an ex and my older kids and now I will have it ten fold with this one. I feel sick.

It’s worse because it’s “me” ending it. He’s quite happy to still have a relationship waiting for him when he decides to come back, and I’m putting my foot down and saying no. I don’t want to give in but I know I will and all this will do is cause me to be a mug for the rest of my life

I hate him. He’s horrible to me. I am so desperate to get the man I love back.

But you prostrating yourself and putting up with his behaviour won't get you the man you love back, it will just ensure that you get to keep the horrible and selfish one.

Cut yourself some slack and be kind to yourself. Hate him, if it gives you the energy and the willpower to get through, otherwise don't even give him headspace. Just one foot in front of the other, day by day. Don't even think about shared Christmasses or the upset that may be in the future, just get through the week.

You don't get the imaginary man back. He's gone or was never there.

And there's nothing failed about your family. Most families are a patchwork of compromises.

If you feel suicidal seek help.