Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Do I leave?

2 replies

Drew2 · 12/09/2019 23:47

I'm a guy, married for 15 yrs, 4 kids. After the the 4th was born, 4 yrs ago, I was not a good husband. I was faithful but cold toward my wife. She needed me and I was physically but not emotionally there for her. In truth, I had become depressed - work was tough and money was tight and things got on top of me, though I didn't tell her this. Around a year ago I realised that what I wanted more than anything was her, once again. I felt just like I'd felt about her when we first married. But she was now not responding to my overtures - not interested. I tried and tried, talking to her, doing things to really make her feel special, showing her just how much she means to me. But she remains detached from me and has now told me that she doesn't have the same feelings she once had. I am finding this extremely difficult. I cannot rest or think about anything but her. I can do my job at the moment, but evenings and weekends together are horrendous, emotionally. I feel like there's a lead weight in my chest, and I'm completely unable to focus. We have talked a few times but she tells me her feelings are unlikely to change. I know that the fault us mine - I neglected her for a period. Although I would be loathe to do it, I suggested that splitting up might be the only option, as I think I am becoming ill, both mentally and physically. She said she does not want this, as she loves me, and we should stay together for the children. I am utterly heartbroken, and a total wreck. I have cried so much, and slept so little.

OP posts:
morrisseysquif · 12/09/2019 23:54

I would strongly suggest counselling first.

mystique76 · 13/09/2019 06:59

It is good news that your wife doesn't want you to leave but in the long run you both can't live like this. Get counselling for you both, and if you think you have depression you need to seek medical help for this for yourself. Good luck

New posts on this thread. Refresh page