I hate seeing women being treated like shit by men and still bending over backwards to please them, whilst other women look on and judge them for it.
I disagree. Some women have absolutely no idea of what 'normal' is. This is not their fault whatsoever, it will be because they were brought up in a chaotic and damaging environment. Such women are the easiest of the prey of abusive men.
Therefore it is really, really important that such women understand that 'normal' people would not put up with what they put up with, that 'normal' women would not lurch from one needy mess to another when given just the tiniest glimmer of (fake) affection, but would be able to stand back just enough to see their situation for what it is.
If you look at all the guidelines for helping victims of abuse you will find that high up on the list, usually right after ensuring a place of safety, will be that such victims need to be shown what a normal relationship looks like.
So what you call 'judging' (and that is your perception coloured by your own reactions) may in fact be one of the greatest helps to a woman who is so far down her own private rabbit hole of hell and confusion that she doesn't know what way is up, let alone that her situation is so far from normal that it is barely human.
Being kind is not the same thing as being helpful.