Where to be buried?

[Aprilcherry04]

Sorry I'd this sounds a bit morbid ( and/or) I've posted in the wrong place. First those of you who are widowed and remarried or those of you who are married to a widower - will u be buried beside your first spouse or your second? My dh has said he would like to buried with me rather than his first wife but probably won't as his children (adults) would be upset. I will probably go along with their wishes to avoid conflict. Sorry again for morbid nature of post we've been changing wills etc and the topic has come up

I'd get cremated and spilt the ashes between the two

What about cremation? With the ashes spread/kept/split?

Ember Cross posts!

Cremation for me too, I'll have no use for real estate when I'm dead.

i would let the person/people that matter to me most decide. By that point I don't care

This is something I worry about a lot too and I still haven't come to a conclusion I'm happy with.

My FIL's second wife followed his wishes. He was buried next to his first wife; the two of them had bought and paid for a burial package for both of them. He and his second wife purchased another plot on the other side of him for her. He died in 1997, and his widow moved away many years ago. She tried to give the plot to anyone in the family but no takers. I think she sold it. I really hope so.

We plan on cremation and at least for me, to release the ashes in the ocean. That way, no hard feelings if the other marries again.

That’s an interesting one and something I think we will have to discuss. Firstly as my MIL died a few years ago. I helped FIL with the whole process, which included a double plot and double headstone (for him). Before the stone was even set, he’d started dating!!! Now has a live in girlfriend, moved her in a few months later. So that’s one discussion to be had. (FIL in his late 80’s)

Also something for me and DH to discuss. I know I’d like to be cremated and ashes spread. I don’t want people feeling as though they have to visit a grave or guilt if they don’t. Not sure what DH wants

Ok we had this when dd died
2nd wife asked if we wanted to split the ashes.

We said 'absolutely ' not.
They were scattered somewhere he loved when alive.

Burial is not for me - such a waste of the limited land we have left.

Cremation is my choice, ashes to be scattered in a favorite stretch of water. No need for "splitting " the ashes between two graves.

Dd - Dad

There aren't any crematoriums local to where we live so it is fairly rare. We have decided that he will discuss with his kids if he can find an appropriate time and go along with their wishes.