I can't get over how my ex has hurt me. I know that I shouldn't care, that I deserve better than him but I just can't seem to move on. I can't understand why he blames ME.
He treated me like crap after the first year or so. Used to see me twice a week then dropped it to once because he preferred to drive a younger woman home each week (I told him he couldn't come back to mine afterwards because it was disturbing my sleep too much). He told me 2 friends were more attractive than me, then justified it by saying its obvious and just because they're younger. He cancelled celebrating my birthday to do the same activity with the woman he keeps driving home. He refused to spend any weekend time with me. He picks me up when everyone else is away and drops me the moment anyone else is available.
I know he treated me like shit. I know I can do better. I left him. I then met someone else but ended it because I wasn't over the ex. He's now blaming me for destroying our relationship by shagging someone else 
. He seems oblivious to the fact we broke up. He doesn't care about what he did to me.
So why can't I just let go? Why can't I stop hurting?
A friend made plans with me last night for a little break in December and I came home and cried - I fucking cried because someone thought I was worth spending time with.
I'm already having therapy. I just can't switch off from the hurt and anger.