Says there's no love there then carries on as normal.

[MG08]

My husband of 3 years and father to our 1 year old has said it doesn't feel like there is any love between us now. I have suggested counselling but he refused, saying that telling a stranger our problems won't help and that basically nothing will. I said he has some decisions to make then and he just came back with 'I know'.

All this was said this to me via text 2 days ago. When he came home that evening he didn't mention it at all, and again today there's been nothing. We are going on holiday at the end of the week and I'm just a bit confused. How can he say that to me and then not want to discuss it in person? I don't really know how to feel, part of me just wants him to leave now but he obviously wants a holiday. I just think is shows complete emotional immaturity.

I don't know what to do.

My ex said the exact same to me. He still carries on as if nothing happened, has a moan and a joke etc. He cheated, I accepted it and he said he would try to make it up to me no matter what. He wanted to try again and was sorry. He did nothing to make it up to me which proves I meant nothing. He is moving out soon and still acts like nothing ever happened unless I raise it and he tells me he has no feelings for me anymore.
I don’t know what to suggest if he has refused counselling. My ex also refused it. The. Funny thing is, he doesn’t want to move out!
Go on your holiday and perhaps it will give you an opportunity to speak with him and see what has changed. Good luck xx

That's really hurtful, op.

Fair enough if he feels that way he should mention it, but to not be prepared to discuss it dies show a lack of maturity.

Why don't you pick up where he left off. Tell him if he doesn't want to talk to a counsellor or talk to you then there is very little hope anything will change.

Why should you be just waiting in limbo?

Take control. Don't allow you future to be dictated by such a weak man.

I think I'll have to wait until after the holiday, it'll be awkward enough now anyway. I'm just finding it hard that I now feel like I can't go to hug him or kiss him goodnight etc as he's basically said doesn't love me, but it was said in a say that suggests I don't love him either, to make himself feel better. We sit and watch tv together like we're in a doctors waiting room. It feels so horrible.

We haven't had much of a relationship recently and have had some issues so it's not come out of the blue, it's just the fact that he hasn't got enough respect for me to even discuss it. When he leaves for work he's all loving towards DD and then I just get a "see you later", it's really hurtful.

Is it possible he's feeling rejected and won't risk putting himself out there anymore?