Absence makes the heart grow fonder or out of site out of mind???

[Newuser987654]

Basically that really.

When I get time with my boyfriend we have the best times. I feel alive and I feel love like no other and it is just perfect, the happiest I can remember being.

However, we are both busy and both have children from previous relationships who we have full time and so we often go two weeks without any quality time together and then a weekend where its all great again. We also try to have one date a fortnight when we go for food when we can get babysitters. At Easter we had a 6 day holiday together that was amazing. We have been like this for around 8 months.
So then when its been around a week without seeing him, I feel a bit flat with it and maybe bored (if that's the right word) and start loosing interest.
We haven't introduced children and I don't really want to if this isn't going anywhere.

Is this relationship doomed because of my lack of interest in times apart as I thought the whole absence makes the heart grow fonder would make us feel stronger but seems to having the opposite reaction off me. He is oblivious to it and is quite happy the way it is.

For me it’s both. When I don’t see someone (not only just romantic relationships) I don’t tend to think about them. When I see someone I like/love after a long absence I am extra happy to see them.

I didn't think the absence makes the heart grow fonder actually applies to when your are apart... but that the fondness is greater when together due to the preceding absence.

Sorry. That doesn't make sense.

I'm trying to say that the heart grows fonder after absence, not during.

I feel like this too and am similarly confused. I think the most likely reason for myself is that I've become used to drama in my past couple of relationships where I've felt like I'm begging for scraps of their attention. I don't have to do this with my DP which gives me time to worry about whether it's right or not.

If he makes you happy (sounds like he does) then things are probably fine. If you were thinking of wanting to meet other men on the days you don't see him then that's another matter. You're allowed to be busy and not think about him! It doesn't mean you don't love him enough.

I think neither really.