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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Going to relate, feeling terrible

0 replies

Oniony · 03/09/2019 08:50

So confused... looking for some reassurance or kind advice.

Been married for twenty years, have two teens. We’ve had a tough couple years including 3 bereavements, which my dh has taken very badly and is now on anti-d’s.

As usual with long marriages, I feel I’ve been at the bottom of the pile for a long time, dh lost his sex drive, whereas I’m very keen. No tlc, or affection - goes both ways, I’m as bad.

I feel exhausted. I’m frightened that I’ve come to the end and I want out. I always believed we’d be forever. I feel shaky from the inside out and have felt this way for probably 8 weeks.

I’ve had a few conversations with dh, and we’re going to relate tomorrow night. I’m feeling the pressure, as he says he wants to fight but I don’t know if I’m past that stage and it makes me feel awful.

An added complication is I keep thinking about a guy my dh works with, so different to my dh, nothing at all has happened. But I keep thinking if I’m thinking about someone else, it’s not fair on my dh.

I just feel fucking awful.

So much more... but I’m anxious to get down what’s in my head now.
Not sure what I want to hear... I’m so frightened.

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