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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Desperately needing some advice

4 replies

mumofthreebabies · 31/08/2019 18:48

To make a long story short me and my partner had a beautiful baby girl 11 weeks ago today before this we had an amazing healthy happy relationship for two years during my pregnancy I found out he had started smoking weed behind my back and lying to me over and over about it .. we got over this and he promised he wouldn't do it again but fast forward last Saturday his father passed away and in the pub afterwards he wasn't drinking much but I had to go home to the baby at half 5 and once I left he started drinking vodka shots and smoking weed and got into such a state he was found on the ground getting sick .. his family sent him home in a taxi and he got into our bed and started saying he was gonna get sick but wouldn't move out of the bed so I was as he calls "slapping" but I was trying to wake him up tapping his arm not lightly but not overly heavy either just cause obviously he was so drunk a tip wouldn't wake him and told him to get up and get sick in the toilet not the bed he kept telling me to leave him alone but I didn't want him puking all over me so I wasn't going to stop until he got up but instead he jumped up out of the bed grabbed me and pinned me on the bed and bit me in the head I was on complete shock and tried to grab him off me and scraped him on the neck cause I have long nails not intentional I just wanted him off me I was terrified and I let a scream out for help so he jumped up and stormed downstairs saying he was goin to kill himself .. I got up and rang his sister terrified telling her what happened and he got on the phone saying he had proof I was hitting him and sent her a picture of the scrape on his neck I was shocked he was turning it on me and sobbed my heart out and told her what happened and she told me to go to bed and sleep it off .. since then I haven't spoken to any of his family nobody has checked in on me so they obviously believe him and he has just acted like it never happened and when I bring it up he tells me it was my own fault for not stopping to try wake him when he told me too .. does me trying to wake him to not puke all over our bed justify what he done to me ? I feel so hurt his sister completely ignored me when I rang her of all people for help .. what would you do in this situation I'm terrified something like this will happen again and I'm worried he now has an addiction to weed seen as he can't help himself doing it knowing it will break up our family ..

OP posts:
Sallycinammonbangsthedruminthe · 31/08/2019 19:01

I am sorry Op but if he behaves like this as a new father theres not much hope really is there? Leave and dont look back ..he is a pillock .Wheres the help for you with a tiny baby?Outrageous behaviour ..don;t stand for it ...time he grew up or did one.You dont need this crap in your life really you dont....

Doyoumind · 31/08/2019 19:08

Speak to Women's Aid and the police and get support to leave.

marvellousnightforamooncup · 31/08/2019 19:41

Leave him.

category12 · 31/08/2019 20:46

You need to leave the relationship - once things get physical, a boudary has been crossed and there's no going back.

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