Leaving a cheating partner and universal credits

[xjo92]

Hi everyone,

I’ve never posted on anything like this before but need some advice and hoping someone can help. Basically I’ve left my partner as I found out last week he had been cheating on me, stayed in a hotel with another girl and been sexting, sending receiving photos/videos and also been attempting to talk to other people online. He’s still trying to get back together with me however there’s no trust anymore and I really just need to move forward with my life. One major issue I have is money as I currently work 16-25 hours a week depending on how much my work need me and I’ve had to apply for universal credits to support me and my 3 year old. Universal credits has confused me so much, I realise I’ve got to go to an interview to get it started however it seemed to imply I would have a work coach and I’d be going to meetings regularly to get this benefit. I just need some info really from anyone on this benefit because the idea of having to keep making the journey by train to the job centre regularly with my 3 year old in tow when I’m already working as much as I can with limited childcare is just stressing me out. I can’t put her in more than the days she’s already doing as the nursery has no spaces currently and I’m unsure I’d be able to afford this anyway. I’m also doing a part time maths course in the evening as I want to go to university eventually so I can eventually get a better job and support me and my daughter myself but need to get my maths gcse first as I failed this in school. It might seem like such a small thing but I’m honestly so stressed out at the idea of having to keep going to the job centre with a 3 year old in tow when it is a 40 minute walk plus 15 min train journey from me on top of working, doing college and looking after my daughter by myself. I’m hoping someone who’s in/ been in a similar situation can shed some light on how regularly i would actually need to be attending interviews? Hope this doesn’t come across as feeling sorry for myself just really stressed out with life right now :(

I found my UC journey really straight forward. I took my newborn to the meetings. Its all online and then you have meetings to show your evidence. After that there so be a waiting time period and then an answer online. I've never had any contact with my work coach, mine is crap.

You can apply for help with childcare costs too

I have only ever been to interviews to show evidence... Which has been twice in three months

Hmm, I’m not being funny but this is totally normal. I am a carer to my disabled child yet still have to attend work focused intervirews at the JC every 6 months with my children in tow. They even wanted me to attend one in the 6 weeks holiday which would involve bringing all four of my children. I always have to take my youngest. Many parents who aren’t working are expected to attend these appointments. You just get on with it, I don’t think it’s a big deal.

I wasn’t asking if individuals felt it was a big deal or not, I was trying to get an idea as to how often I would need to be attending interviews etc as like I said I am working and studying already. If you’re going to an interview every 6 months obviously that isn’t a frequent thing and yes you’re right thats totally manageable, but as I said in the original post I have no understanding of the benefit system as I’ve never claimed anything before and had no idea if I would be expected to attend a meeting weekly for example.

@missfloof ahh ok thats no where near as regular as I was thinking, and is totally manageable. I was worried it was going to be a weekly thing!

@PumpkinP I wasn’t asking if individuals felt it was a big deal or not, I was trying to get an idea as to how often I would need to be attending interviews etc as like I said I am working and studying already. If you’re going to an interview every 6 months obviously that isn’t a frequent thing and yes you’re right thats totally manageable, but as I said in the original post I have no understanding of the benefit system and had no idea if I would be expected to attend a meeting weekly for example.

If you work 36 (I think it's that, or 35) hours a week you won't be expected to find another job. You will be expected to get another one if you aren't working that many and you have to upload evidence and if it doesn't affect work you'll be expected to attend meetings, I think it's every week or so where I am.
Unfortunately i was also told that I can only be on uc without working until my baby is one so you will have to work the 30 odd hours if you only have a 3 year old.
The initial meeting is fairly straight forward where you get asked questions and have to provide the paperwork they ask for and the bank card of the account you want the money to paid into. They're fairly relaxed about you bringing children to this meeting as well I've found, the woman who helped me whilst pregnant begged me to bring the newborn in.
Hope this helps

Just do a change in circumstances and remove him from your UC claim , he then can claim in his own right .... you can continue to receive support and if you require childcare costs they pay at least 85 percent of the cost ... there is a process of course ... you will get a single persons allowance attached to your UC payment as well as work allowance and child allowance .. I know it's a pain in the arse but once it's done and kicked it all will be good .. remember the less you earn the more you get and the only positive thing about UC as a worker you have an assessment period each month so if you get paid less one month you should get paid more UC .. if you have rent costs see if your eligible , also council tax reduction if he didn't there you will get single persons discount .. got to your local CAB and see what support is put there .. you may be able to access other stuff such as grant for utilities etc.. I work in this field and it will be well worth an appointment ..

I wouldn't worry about him he can sort himself out

I'm sure it's 16 hours for single parents also..

@aewwwenxt Hey thank you that was really helpful, I did read online that you’re not expected to work the full time hours if you're a lone parent with a child under the school age but I’ve read so many different things everywhere. I’m glad to hear you’ve not found the process stressful, its definitely made me feel less worried about the meetings if you've been taking a newborn, I wasn’t sure if it would be frowned upon When i took my daughter.
@Kerry197878 I’m not on UC right now so its a totally new claim and the whole system just confused me when I was going through it online so thought this was the best place to get some answers! Thank you for the advice about the council tax that hadn’t even crossed my mind but I’ll definitely be doing that now he’s moved out.

Some inaccurate advice on here OP.

No you will not be expected to work 35 hours. Nor will you necessarily have regular appointments. I've had precisely 1 appointment back in April to present documents and get my code to log in online. I had a telephone appointment today. That's it.

I work 22.5 hours a week and am a single parent to 2 school age children. I have been told I will not be expected to find more work and as long as I show regular earnings, I will be left alone.

The only issue for me has been my assessment periods. Mine go from the 28th-26th of the month. My pay day is the 28th. In June I got paid on the 28th then July 28th was a Sunday so I got paid on the 26th, UC saw I earned 'double' and cut my money. I lost over £500. Now this month it has shown I've earned nothing because I wasn't paid from the 27th July - 26th Aug so they gave me a telephone appointment and started sending me (highly ridiculous and inappropriate) job adverts. When they called I pointed out the no earnings was due to their assessment period and my payday. The telephone appointment is automatically generated because my claim showed zero earnings. Work coach told me I will be take off the mailing list for jobs and I'll be left alone as long as I have my regular income going in.

It's fairly straightforward tbh. My friend claims it and has had no appointments bar the initial one and she works 23 hours a week. My partner claims and is on apprenticeship wage so very low earnings and he only had to go to appointments when he wasn't working. None since then. You can send messages through your online journal on your UC account and they will respond.

Hi there,

I also think that as you are already working and have a very young child you will not be expected to attend regularly. I believe that is for people who are hardly working at all or not working. Please don't worry, it will be fine. Once you attend the initial interview I think you will be reassured.

Hi i thought i would update on this in case someone else is trying to find out the same information. I went to my meeting today and was told as I’m currently doing 16-20 hours with a child under school age I am currently working enough and do not need to search for another job or go to weekly meetings, they said the meetings will probably be every 4-6 months just to update information or if something changes.

@phonenixisflying @ newme2019 thanks both of you :) I attended today and everything you've both said is correct just in case anyone else is looking for information on this thread.