Advice please, stressed and upset

[Tiredmum8]

This maybe long so bear with me, iv been with my dh for 6 years now, I have children but not his. Thing is at the beginning like always he was amazing, helped around house, helped with kids, now he comes in from work, does nothing!
just sits on Xbox for a few hours that’s it! We both work he does 48 hours a week, I do 36.
I’m just exhausted! I can’t talk to him anymore because he says I’m just nagging and he works hard! But so do I!
He’s also crap with money! Never got any left so is always coming to me to lend money, I say lend but I hardly ever get it back!
He doesn’t interact with the kids as much either anymore, his hobbies and Xbox come first!
I just need to know where u go from here as like I said I can’t talk to him at all anymore! He doesn’t seem to care how exhausted and fed up I am! Thankyou for reading

What are you getting out of this relationship, OP? Does he contribute anything at all to the joy of your existence, or is he just a drain on your finances and one more person to do chores for?
You need to have a proper discussion with him, and basically tell him that things improve or he leaves. He sounds to me as though he’s checked out already.

That doesn’t sound good at all. He is doing 12 more hours at work than you which is a big difference. Was he doing less hours before when he was helping out more?
Are there any good things about the relationship? If he doesn’t have anytime for you and won’t try and make things better then perhaps you need to split up?

So you're his housemaid, cook and free cashpoint? No wonder he wants you to shut up and stop "nagging." Sounds like he's got it made!
Tell him you're not prepared to exist like this and either shape up or bugger off!

Well you have to talk to him OP, you're in a state and the relationship is doing nothing for you so it's cards on the table time, not just moaning about socks on the floor time (IYKWIM). Have you tried saying 'Look, we need to have a serious talk. Tonight at 9, when the DC are in bed'? Then tell him what your needs are and gauge whether he has any interest in meeting them.

Personally any grown man who spends any time at all on Xbox should be put out to grass but apparently I'm just old-fashioned!

Sounds a bit like he's in a rut. He works long hours, is there a chance to bring them down for him? I know when my hours are very long some weeks then I just tend to zone out a bit. Either way you need a proper chat together.

Personally any grown man who spends any time at all on Xbox

It depends! We’re childfree by choice so my DH can spend all night doing as he pleases, as can I. It’s more difficult if you have responsibilities to children.