Hey all. Have written and rewritten this so many times.
My dad had an affair when I was younger (about 20 years ago now) and married the woman eventually. She has been awful from the start, but many people think she's lovely because of the mask she can put on.
I won't go into every bad thing that she's done, but - for example - me and my dad mainly text to communicate and I found out she had muted me on his phone so he wasn't seeing my messages (he didn't realise this and when I showed him and she saw us discussing it, she actually laughed and said 'you're not supposed to tell him'). Really weird behaviour.
Recently my dad and me had a falling out which was indirectly related to her, and he hasn't spoken to me since. It's been 3 weeks, which is the longest we haven't talked in years. I am 26 but have had some MH problems in the past which made my dad and I much closer and spend more time talking together.
She constantly implies i'm over sensitive which my dad has now taken on too and likes to say I am, along with over emotional. It really makes me feel dismissed and I feel as though i've lost my dad to such a toxic environment. I am so proud of the strength i've built over the years, and being called these things over and over is really crushing.
I'm just not sure what to do. She is a very cruel, jealous, unkind person and is quite hard on my dad. She manipulates my dad and my grandmother who lives with them too. I feel that over the years, my dad has changed because of this woman's behaviour and now reflects her judgemental attitude and meanness quite often.
Has anyone else had a similar experience? I'm finding it so hard to deal with. I feel like my dad is also becoming a narcissist now. I don't feel I can explain this to anyone. I feel so drained, lost, and question myself constantly whether I really am just overemotional and a brat.
Please be gentle, having a really tough time with this. Any advice or even words of understanding would be so appreciated.