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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

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Original poster

Is my partner gay or bi

17 replies

Lauraloo123 · 14/08/2019 10:02

Incident happened couple weeks back where we were out drunk very drink and we were talking with a gay guy we know to see anyway long story short outside he ended up at king my fellas thing I said it would turn me on bit it was more a of a test now the guy is wanting to go out with us I think there is something up with that but my partner said yes to it

OP posts:

Thingsdogetbetter · 14/08/2019 10:18

This makes no sense....... Have you had a threesome, been offered a threesome, suggested a threesome? Did you already suspect your bf is bi, so set a trap for him? Why won't you just ask him like an adult? Has the gay guy suggested a threesome or just meeting up? Are you drunk now?

Try rewriting your op.

newmomof1 · 14/08/2019 10:34

Did you tell your gay friend to touch your bf's penis because it would turn you on?

I don't really understand your OP but looks to me like you want your bf to be bi so you can have a threesome with your gay friend?

MildDrPepperAddiction · 14/08/2019 10:39

Agree with pp, your post sounds scattered. Have you talked to him?

Original poster

Lauraloo123 · 14/08/2019 10:59

It's auto type no o said it at the time I didn't know what I was doing we actually thought that night that we had been spiked with something anyway no I don't want a bi threesome what with a gay why would I what that and yes I've spoken to him asked him outright was he bi curious or gay n he said no but I'm just worried I've had shitty relationships in the past n don't want to be fooled again I just think for him to say yes to drinks with this guy after all I've said about what happened it doesn't add up

OP posts:

OpheliaTodd · 14/08/2019 11:00

Nope. Still gibberish. Try some full stops and commas.

Original poster

Lauraloo123 · 14/08/2019 11:01

And no a threesome hasn't been talked about what I'm saying is the gay guy wants to go out drinking with us on his own I just think that he may think there's more to it ..maybe

OP posts:

NoBaggyPants · 14/08/2019 11:05

You're not making any sense. Wrote a post about what originally happened and read it before you press the post button.

user1480880826 · 14/08/2019 11:05

Your messages would make far more sense with a bit of punctuation. They are total gibberish.

It sounds like a gay guy wants to go out for a drink with you and your partner. Perhaps your partner is agreeing because he’s just being polite.

Your first message made no sense so I have no idea what happened the night you went out drinking.

whitetoblerone · 14/08/2019 11:05

Your posts are very difficult to understand. As a PP said, try some punctuation and we may be able to decipher what you mean!

TubbyMonkeh · 14/08/2019 11:05

Even if he was bi he is in a relationship with you.

So the issue here is trust and not sexuality.

newmomof1 · 14/08/2019 11:13

Ok, so are you saying that you're worried because your gay friend wants to go for drinks with you both, and your boyfriend agreed to go for drinks with you and your gay friend, so now you're worried your boyfriend fancies your gay friend?

VenusTiger · 14/08/2019 11:17

Wthf does the OP mean?

Can you rewrite it?

Thingsdogetbetter · 14/08/2019 11:17

So a gay friend touched his penis which you encouraged as a 'test'? You said it would turn you on, and I would assume your bf complied to turn YOU on not gay friend.

You have since asked your boyfriend is he is bi or gay, and he says no? But you don't believe him because of the sexual test YOU set and encouraged him to participate in?

Gay friend has asked just bf out for drinks? And you suspect bf is lying about being gay because he said yes to having drinks?

Firstly, testing a bf is immature and has now backfired on you - as tests usually do. Secondly, if gay friend was a friend before then asking him out for drinks is normal. It is immature and frankly nasty to use a gay friend as a tester of your bf. Gay friend has feelings and you basically used him.

However, if you suspect gay friend is now trying to start something sexual with your bf, (after YOU encouraged him to!) and your bf is being naive about the 'friendship', then your bf will set the record straight (no pun intended). Your bf has every right to have drinks with a friend, gay or not.

This is all consequences of you setting tests. They are never a good idea and borderline abusive. Does your bf know it was a test? Do you set other tests? Are you actually ready for a relationship?

VenusTiger · 14/08/2019 11:19

@thingsdogetbetter - ah thanks!

In that case, you both sound about 12!

OohthatlovelyNigelfromBabyClub · 14/08/2019 11:21

I think the key lies in the part that reads "long story short outside he ended up at king my fellas thing"
I think that is supposed to say sucking.

Zoflorabore · 14/08/2019 11:42

Another one who thinks it was supposed to say "sucking" my fella's "thing" which puts a whole new slant on things....

Thingsdogetbetter · 14/08/2019 11:55

Nope to new slant. She encouraged bf and gay friend to participate while all off their heads. Handjob or blowjob makes no difference. Receiving a bj as part of a 'threesome' to turn his gf on does not make him gay or bi. Just too willing to please her and being to drunk or drugged up to know better.

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