Am I too needy?

[terere]

He is a friend of a friend.
We started socialising together and started kissing/sleeping together.
He asked me to go the cinema and got a bit stressy when people asked if it was a date.
We went out again for drinks just the two of us.
He texts me daily and get on.
I started asking questions,if he thought of me as a friend or more and did he want to meet up and if he didn't just tell me why.
He said he was busy with his son so I said
Fair enough,can we meet again soon?
He said I was coming on too strong.
Was I ?

Doesn't sound like it from what you have said. Does he want to call all the shots do you think?

Kissing/sleeping together = you're not friends. He doesn't want to be friends, nor anything more. He's not worth your time and you can do better and deserve more. It's now your decision whether you hang around for him because he's made it clear he's only in it for convenience.

Not really, its up to him to express what he wants, youre not a mind reader. imo he wants casual sex and therefore doesnt want to have the where are we going chat. Back off a bit, if he calls you can ask him what he wants.

Friends but friends that benefit him.

No, not from your post! I think its fair to expect to know where you stand if you are sleeping with someone and going out socially.
He's an arse, dump him.

From a guys point of view I don't see why you had to start asking questions so soon, personally you could have just seen how it went for a bit--No idea what / how many questions you asked or how often you texted him but if I liked you it wouldn't really put me off.

It sounds like hes using you when its convenient for him and then turning it round on you when you rightly so want to know where you stand!

I agree with the "back odd and see if he calls you " - but he sounds like a knob - id find someone who treats you like you deserve :)

Given that you're sleeping together I think it's reasonable to assume you're more than friends! It's exhausting and boring having to dance round the edges of an issue for fear of FRIGHTENING a man you're shagging. I'd ditch him for one who isn't going to freak out so easily.

He's an arse, dump him.

You can't dump someone you're not in a relationship with.

You're looking for different things OP. He doesn't have to tell you why he doesn't want more, and you don't have to tell him why you no longer wish to sleep with him.

I think you were putting him on the spot asking for reasons why he wouldn't want to be with you. If he doesn't want to be in a serious relationship with you, he doesn't have to justify it, though he should be clear.

I'm exhausted with not being able to ask him where I stand.
If he wants to back off for a bit or if he's never gonna want more.
If I have a constant knot in my stomach daily

How long has all this seeing/sleeping with each other been happening?

The power dynamic here sounds just wrong. If you are feeling 'knot in the stomach' I think that I would back off.

Not long just since early may

He is only interested in one thing - friends with benefits. And he doesn't even seem to be all that bothered about the 'friends' part of that.

This is going nowhere.

He won't set any dates in for meeting up,it's always on he's terms.
I really like him,and he's hot and cold behaviour is messing with my head

He won't set any dates in for meeting up,it's always on he's terms.

Sorry for the cliche, but "He's just not that into you"

I don't think you come across as needy, you just wanted to know where you stood with him, which is fair enough.

I think in your position I would just move on, but as I get older I have less time for the "Does he like me" foxtrot.

3 months is long enough, but has there only been two "dates" in that time, the drinks and cinema? If so that's not much sign it's going anywhere.

I don't think you've been too needy, you have to know where you stand at some point but I probably wouldn't have kept asking. He's not showing much interest in it progressing.

I'd say you know where you stand now. He's obviously not wanting it to progress. Your asking to see him shouldn't have had that reaction if he wanted to see you, he would've came up with an alternative.

Sack him & meet someone worth your time, who doesn't have you second guessing, scared to ask if you can see him after 3 months or afraid to be on a real date with you.

4 months is long enough to find out where you stand. He's only messing with your head because now you are invested --- He's not.

Start dating other people.

He said he was busy with his son so I said
Fair enough,can we meet again soon?
He said I was coming on too strong.
Was I ?

No.

In no world is that ‘coming on strong’ - he sounds like he wants it all his own way, so if I were you I’d leave him to it. You deserve someone who doesn’t make you feel like that.

It sounds like he just wants sex/FWB and you want something more. Not worth getting stressed over. Just leave it and hopefully you will find someone who is on the same page as you.

ah just get some more eggs in the basket

you will be amazed how easy you see how they don't fit when you have a few to compare to. Don't sleep with them just date them, Let them eliminate themselves and then when you found the one you want. Drop the others and close the accounts. I wouldn't even mess about with these dudes. lol.

He just wanted a shag.

Why do these blokes only accuse women of coming on to strong AFTER sex??

Too* strong