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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

WWYD. Secret Stella and Woeful Relationship

1 reply

Arrbee · 11/08/2019 22:42

Oh dear. Been discovering stella cans for 6 years now, starting when pregnant with DS on holiday. Last time just this week. There's always an excuse, can't sleep, having tough time etc. I don't honestly believe there is a major dependency, no heavy drinking, safety issues etc., at least not in my presence anyway. But obviously lies and secrecy. So some degree of an alcohol problem. I think this distrust alongside having two spirited, energetic but beautiful kids who have taken every bit of my energy, has eroded things over the years. I take partial blame for the non-drinking erosion of our relationship.
I'm going to cut a long story short and eeek appreciate I may get some direct advice here... Not slept together since DD, now 3. I know. Neither of us really talk anymore but we're doing our best by the kids. We have not discussed separation properly, neither of us really know what to do I think. He has zero family to speak of and I worry about that. Is already seeing a therapist. Only last year lost his beloved grandfather and its still raw. It kills me to think of not coparenting. I would happily coparent but surely need to know what the drinking is all about and have an agreement in being grown up.
WWYD... x

OP posts:
Arrbee · 12/08/2019 21:28

Nobody been through anything similar? 😔

OP posts:
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