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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Lazy drunken partner

6 replies

BlackRock23 · 10/08/2019 18:26

Am at the end of my tether. Been with my partner for 10 years and can't cope with his drinking or apathy any longer.

When we met we both drank a lot. I had depression and used alcohol as a coping mechanism. I'm now sober after some major health problems.

We bought our first house last year and it needs a lot of work. I'm pretty handy, keen to get things done and enjoy fixing things up. My partner, on the other hand, has absolutely no interest and told me this week he doesn't want to do anything to the house.

Instead, he gets wasted every weekend and sits around gaming.

The house is a tip. If I start cleaning or trying to do any DIY he yells at me because it "stresses him out".

The other day he told me he wants to spend £250 on a new guitar. (He already has 4). But when I mentioned that I wanted to fix something small, that has been driving me crazy and will cost around £50, he said it was too expensive and I should just stop moaning about it.

I now resent him and having to live in this dump of a house that I can't do anything to.

Do I cut my losses and leave, hoping he'll buy me out?

OP posts:
Bananalanacake · 10/08/2019 18:31

yes. I think it's better if you go it alone. must be annoying watching him waste money on booze. he won't change unless it comes from him.

TowelNumber42 · 10/08/2019 18:33

Can you afford to buy him out? Sounds like you will actually do the work. Is it in a state where you'd get your money back if you sell it?

BlackRock23 · 10/08/2019 18:54

Unfortunately, I can't afford to buy him out. He is waiting for a sizeable inheritance so will definitely be able to buy me out

OP posts:
Tinkerbrews · 10/08/2019 19:25

I'd cut my losses and leave if I were you.

OliveToboogie · 10/08/2019 22:01

Time to call it a day. Get him to buy you out. Get your own wee place. You deserve yo be happy... Your not

TowelNumber42 · 11/08/2019 16:10

How soon could he buy you out?

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