Husbands relationship with his ex

[Barbie2016]

Hi everyone I could really do with some advice as I feel like I’m going insane!

My husband has a 15 year old son with his ex. We have been married for 8 years and have a 2 year old son together. I feel like their co parenting oversteps certain boundaries and makes me feel incredibly insecure.

On two separate occasions his ex has stopped him from seeing his son because she caught feelings for my husband and when they weren’t reciprocated she turned nasty! They seem to get on really well again but Sometimes he will go over to have dinner with his son and not come home until 2am. She has now invited him to her sisters wedding which is tomorrow and this is what I have a massive issue with!! He’s not taking me or my son because his ex doesn’t like me which is a bloody cheek given that she’s the one that is after my husband and despite that I’ve always been polite towards her so that my husband can have a relationship with his son!

I think it’s weird that he would go to her sisters wedding! They aren’t a couple and there are other ways he can spend time with his son that doesn’t need to be at a family event. My husband assured me that he’s going purely for his son but I think it’s massively disrespectful to me and our relationship. I feel like she will be laughing at the fact that I’m at home whilst she’s there with him. Ive tried for 8 years to make this work but I just feel like my husband is crossing the line with this now.

Am I being rediculous or right to feel the way I do?

This is mental, and I speak as someone who likes to think they are the poster-child for getting on with the ex-husband. He is married again, I am single.

We never see eachother alone for drinks, dinner etc - why would we?

My ex has attended various family events since the divorce - but always with his wife. If it's purely a family event then why would she not be invited? She is family by extension. She herself decided not to come to certain events (funerals etc). But that was her choice - she was always welcome.

And yes, the reason the invitation is extended is for it to be good for our son - but if that were the only reason, your husband's wife would be welcome too. I am struggling to imagine a scenario where my ex-husband's wife would not be invited to a family wedding. And we wouldn't expect him to come if she wasn't.

And of course, there are some families who don't get on like we do - in that case the child goes and the ex-husband doesn't.

I cannot see any situation where where the ex would go with his ex. Just why?

But remember - he is your problem, no-one else. He is agreeing to it.